The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I know I hae only been here a while, and I may not have senority to be sending so many posts, but this is my haven, my outlet, and you all have so many wonderul suggestions, thoughts, and you truly care.
Like I said, I have my A with me under false pretenses. This is MY HUD apartment. But he uses the fact that he help me financially against me, especially when I strongly suggest that he take his butt out of the house and go somewhere else for a while to give me a break. Even if I say it to mean go a way for a while and give me a break, he takes it to mean I want to end it all. He gets carried away, and contstantly says, that oh yeah, I will be alone and he isn't taking MY shit anymore. Total denial of his part in it with the drinking. Boggles the mind and frustrates me to no end.
I desire to day for him to just find something or somewhere to go. I do not want his ass planted here the whole day, drinking, being obnoxious, etc. I know It is my place and he really should n't be here. Does he have any point because he is helping me financially? Mom and dad used to help me some and I am so afraid of change. I know I truly love him, but totally sick of this behavior.
Somone please help me figure out a way to nicely explain I need him to find somewhere to go all day, and I mean ALL day. If I do get him to go, I sure want to lock the doors and stuff. I do not want a conflict. My health sucks and he does nothing but agggravate it.
I am still very confused, trying to read and understand the posts.
Since in fact it is my apartment to begin with, I know I have the right to do this, BUT HOW? And how without worrying about the finances?
Please someone help me.
I need some program literature to read, can't get out, but need some help.
__________________
This is HippieTrippieChick Signing Off
Be blessed and have a wonderful day.
Remember God loves you.
PEACE
I am so sorry you are going through all this. I know for me, many times I would feel trapped into not doing what was right for me. But the funny thing is that nobody else imposed that feeling, it was just me.
Setting boundries is a logical decission I think. Reguardless of what anybody thinks what do you need to have, or to have not happen. It is completely up to you and really doesn't rely on how he will feel about it.
Boundries are very tough for me still, and I have yet to create one that didn't tic someone off.
As far as posting... as many as you want or need. There is no limitation here.
Take care of you!
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"Good judgement comes from experience... experience comes from bad judgement" - unknown
