My husband said to me today:  IS there ever a day when he (our son) doesn't have some trauma or drama going on?.....my response was, of course, NO. He leans toward chaos in his life; whether the situation is trivial or huge, all the same. It tires us out so much. I have been thinking the last hour or so that As's brains must be wired for chaos. The answer they have found is that alcohol quiets the chaos temporarily. Of course, enough and the need become both physical and psychological. We still don't label our son as an A; I haven't found a definition yet that fits him exactly. I just know that I often feel to blame and that I somehow caused him to be this way. When he was pre-adolescent was when his approach to life surfaced....trauma and upheaval. In school, in sports, in relationships. Trivial or huge...all the same. I would step in and "solve" the problem, make him feel better, worry that he was not adjusting well, etc etc etc. So enabling takes on many different meanings for me. I thought it was love to try and help him through his problems or supposed problems??? Guess not. Each day now, as his life has progressed to his family breaking up, he calls me once or more daily to chat about some new crisis; it could be someone at work being "stupid", his ex being "nasty" to him, his car making a funny noise, his head splitting from traffic or chemical fumes at work, or whatever. See what I mean? I see that these things vary from serious to ridiculous; he doesn't. He is drinking less and worrying and obsessing more these days. I don't expect it to improve really, but just wondered if such emotional upheaval is typical. I wish someone who has recovered personally would respond to the question?  Is someone who drinks too much or is an alcoholic wired differently from birth as to handling life and what it brings?