The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I had a really bad day yesterday. It was one of those days that I did not get out of bed for very long.
Today is much better! My A son seems to be spiraling downward. My thought for this is that he does not have a job, seems to be very depressed and just doesn't know what he is going to do. Now...that is just my opinion.
He said he sent out 8 resumes last week. He did not get one response. That is very unusual for the type of business he is in. He has been very drunk when I have talked to him this week.
This morning I have decided that his HP is working on him and I need to stay out of the way. By staying out of the way, I cannot offer him ANY help. It is so hard but where I was yesterday I believe I cannot intervene. He needs to hit bottom and come back up...if that is possible and what God wants for him. I cannot watch this for the next 20 years so he either needs to hit bottom or die. I cannot believe that sentence can come out of my mouth but I watched his A father, from afar, live a life of nothing but drunkeness while his mother took care of him until he died. Thank God he died before her because he probably would have committed suicide without his enabler.
So, all I can say this morning is "Here he is God"!
That is soo hard to do. It is a tough place to be. It goes against every instinct I have to do that, but you said a mouthfull about son's father. When that is the option, it makes the effort more worthwhile.
There are far worse things than being out of work, or out on your own, or not having the car you want.
You are a good Mom for not helping him to hurt himself. If he can find his way out of this dark place, I bet he will tell you so.
My prayers are with you and your family this day.
Take care of you!
__________________
"Good judgement comes from experience... experience comes from bad judgement" - unknown
Girl, you are doing the exact right thing. I know it's killing you. I completely understand. I so do. But you are doing him the biggest favor in the universe. Seriously. I promise.
Go gailey, go gailey, go gailey!