The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Hello every one , i have been in the chat room a couple of times and i am looking forward to getting to know you all better ODAT. I was Wondring how your group handles members who have been around a while, who know about sharing from the Alanon program who continue to share about out side issues. would like to have feed back from around the world and around the country. I live in Los Angeles.
I have attended online meetings here and they are run by strict protocal, in fact they are much more formal than the face to face meetings I have attended, which have a teeny bit of crosstalk at times.
I was told that before and after and between meetings it is "open chat" or in other words chitchat like you would have after a meeting. Informal gathering of alanon friends, no "rules" other than decency, common sense, common courtesy and concern for new ones, trying to encourage them and give them support. Letting people vent and giving them support and showing concern and venting if you need to and asking for and getting support. Remembering at all times what has brought us together though (alanon)...so all "outside" chat (like talking about your kids, etc.) ceases when someone is hurting and needs to vent. I have seen this in chat.
I agree with Isabela about the meetings online here. I've never seen anything "out of line" during the online meetings.
Open chat is wonderful, in my opinion, because I can get issues addressed immediately if need be, and I've come in many times needing ESH right then and there. I also love the fact that we can just chat about anything during open chat. It helps me to relax, and take a break from the day-to-day issues of dealing with my life with an alcoholic (sober, albeit). Sometimes it's hard to talk to my A about everyday stuff, because he is of a totally different mindset (in my opinion, an alcoholic mindset, if you will). For example, I asked him one day if he ever thinks about what he'd like to do when he retires (he's 46)...and he had this blank look on his face. He said that he never really thinks about it. He usually never has an answer about something in the future, plans, retirement, etc. I know we shouldn't "worry" about things other than in the present moment, but shoot, I'd like to know what dreams, if any, he has for our retirement years!
At the f2f meetings I attend, it's usually relaxed and some slight cross-talk does occur. But it's always on topic. I live in a very small town, and everyone knows each other pretty well. We don't usually adhere to a "strict" protocol (except when a particular man is chairing ~ he's a stickler for following the rules to the letter!).
I am so sorry if I gave the impresstion that this problom was happening in the chat room no this Happened last night at my home group. How ever the member that shared does this at every meeting .. i was just wondring how other groups handle this.
usually there is a moderator at each meeting that can stear steer that person back to the chosen topic.
Or at the beginning of the meeting annouce the topic and request we all stick to that topic but can always add any other alanon type issue.
sometimes people like that need to be drawn out.
LIke the topic is, do I dumb the booze or throw away the pills.
ok people raise hands to share. hello mary you have the floor, then the person intros themselves, hi mary, what do you feel about dumping booze/other drugs?
It is worth a try.
hugs hon, love,debilyn who thought she was sharing too much about Estersue or Fannie alice her pet piggers...smoinks