The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I'm writing to thank all of you who have touched my life via this site. My f2f mtgs and of course my sponsor deserve (and will get) a lot of my thanks too, but there is something about all of you and this site that really helped me to understand and incorporate the al anon program into my life these last few months that has made a huge difference.
The short story is that while this has been building for a while, I've been aware (1st A) pretty much from the beginning of starting my current job a few months ago that something wasn't right. Ditto with my landlord. Since finding this board, I've started the practice of starting my days touching base with HP and putting my life and my will in HP's hands -- and asking HP to guide me in the next right thing to do.
So this week, well, if it wasn't clear to me b4, it became very clear that the only way for me (or pretty much anyone) to stay in my job was to be willing to give up my self respect. Of course, I turned to HP again. But I had what I needed because of al anon - I know that I cannot change, cure or control others. I must see and accept (2nd A) a situation for what it is. OK; it is what it is. So, I must accept that -- and so I did. ANd that led me to Action (3rd A) - SO, what am I gonna do about it. This is the message that I got from all of you on this Bd -- no other al anon group put it this way, or at least I didn't hear it till I got here. So, what AM I gonna do about it.
I weighed my options. I made sure I was not cutting off my nose to spite my face. I took care care of myself. I said what I meant and I didn't say it mean. And I chose my actions. On the day that I was weighing my options someone asked me to accept a live in job where the total compensation is what I am getting now with my current position, but not enough to keep the place I rent (cause it includes a place) and while it is not work that reflects my education, it is good honest caring work which will provide me with the flexibility I need to pursue other intersts I want to have as a part of my life; I can maintain my self respect and take care of myself. WHy did that happen on that day? I accepted. I gave notice at work and with my LL. ANd I thanked HP.
Hooray for you! I'm so excited for you. HP does have a way of working things. I too am in a job where I am not appreciated. But oh well, I have to be grateful that I didn't loose anything in the floods, have a roof over my head, etc. At some point I know I will find the right job.
I have a lot to be thankful for: sober hubby, food on my table, roof over my head, a puurrrrrfect kitty, great friendships and the love and support I have found here. I am also having a glorious relaxing day to day and that is something that I have desperately needed as of late. Too much chaos and bad news. So I revel in this day.
Good for you for taking care of yourself. Best of luck in your new job. You're going to be fabulous! Have a great time in your new place.
Love and blessings to you.
Live strong, Karilynn & Pipers Kitty
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It's your life. Take no prisoners. You will have it your way.
I have definitely had my share of work issues in the last 5 years. I have to say since being in al-anon my over reactions to them have lessend. I have also had my share of landlord issues. That is of course complicated by living with the A who is totally impossible at times.
I work on all these daily. I interviewed for a job last week that would be ideal for me. If it happens, it happens I am detached rather than obsessed. I am also still looking. I hope to someday have better choices but I know that is made up of lots of better choices every day. Stay in the moment, keep busy, keep focused on me. Work my program and more.
I am so grateful you are here and sharing on these issues they once consumed me. They still affect me deeply.
