The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I have an online sponsor. I went to the alanon online room and was in the chat alot. In fact I started with online before face to face. I got face to face sponsor she really didn't help me. I am not suggesting that face to face sponsor don't work I enjoy it, however there are some people that might do better with someone online. The sponsor I have is wonderful I wouldn't give her up for anything. I have grown so much with her and I can't believe my growth at times. I type all the questions out in what every I am answering and it works out, she reads them and then we talk about it. She helps me think about how I feel about things. Which that helps alot. Just because the person is online doesn't miean they can't help. With my online sponsor we find time to chat and go over things. Some people have online sponsors and they go back and forth through email, i like to be able to talk to my sponsor one on one, and that is how i work better, and my friend does the email way. Both of the ways are good it depends on what will help u grow. Don't not go to face to face meeting, but just know u have choices on where u find ur sponsor.
-- Edited by nycbt at 10:19, 2006-07-13
__________________
Hey everyone watch me grow. I go thru good & bad times. each day i am getting stronger.
I am glad to hear this. I am kind of looking around for an online sponser. We only have the f2f I started here and there are only the two of us. We are also in summer break. So there is really no one around here for a f2f sponser.
I was seriously wondering how an online sponser would work and you reassured me.
Thank you for posting this. I have seriously thought about asking a couple of people from the chat room to do this for me but after reading some of the posts on the message board have stopped. Some people are so against this.
I would love to have a face to face sponsor but I am from a small city, the meetings are small and I have yet to feel that kind of connection. I hope that eventually I can find a face to face sponsor but it is nice to see that it works for people who work online also.
lilms
__________________
Two things: 1. Recovery is a process, not an event.....and.... 2. You only get to go around once. Leave em laughing and make it worth your while
Thank you for posting on this and letting the newcomers know that online sponsorship is available to them.
I'd like to address lilms reply about others being against it.
If you think that online sponsorship is what will work for you and your recovery right now, I would suggest that you embrace it. I have heard negative talk as well about online sponsorship, and I think part of that is that online meetings and such are meant to suplement face to face meetings and not replace them.
However, there are many people here who can not get to meetings and this place is how they work their program. There is nothing wrong with that. It is just some may feel that others are losing out on the more personal touch if they are not working face to face.
You know what is best for you. This is your program work it the way that you need to.
My opinion is that if you need online sponsorship to work the steps, then that is better than not working them at all.
And please if you ask someone to sponsor you and they say no, pleae don't take it personal. They may already be sponsoring people or may not feel ready to take on a sponsee.
Yours in recovery,
Dolphin123
__________________
"Today's problems can not be solved if we still think the way we did when we created them" -Albert Einstein
Everyone usually has a little different opinion on sponsorship online, f2f, male to male, female to female, it is all about our experience, strength and hope. We share what has worked for us in the past and hope you will benefit from it in your recovery. Anytime you start working with a sponsor, our home group always suggestion that you start out as a temporary situation. That way, if for some reason it begins to feel like it isn't working out, since it's temporary it is easier to say I would like to try something else.
I just had to go through the painful (for me it was painful) experience of getting a new f2f sponsor. My first sponsor had many life changes (job, relationship, etc.) and was unable to make meetings, meet with me, return phone calls & emails on a consistant basis. After about a year of this, it was not working for me anymore. I had to tell her I needed to find someone else, plus then ask someone else to be my sponsor. Talk about getting out of your comfort zone. But I did it. It's been about a month ago and it's going good. We are working through the steps again together. I have several sponsees (some f2f and 1 online). As a sponsor, I feel like I need to keep in a good relationship with my sponsor so that I can try to stay somewhat healthy to be able to share my recovery with my sponsees.
I agree with Dolphin, if you ask someone to be your sponsor and they are unable to do so at this time, please don't be hurt, it is probably not about you. Keep searching, I'm sure your HP will lead you to the right sponsor for you,
Keep coming back, it works if you work it,
Rita
__________________
No matter what me and my God are going to be ok, even better than OK -
I agree with you i believe that hp gives us the right sponser when we are ready to listen to what they have to offer whether it be online or f2f. As long as the sponser you ask knows how to work thier program that is all that matters in my opinion. I have had 1 f2f and 4 online sponsers. I now have had a sponser for almost a year next month and she has helped me in ways i never thought possible and she is online.
There are some who cant go to f2f meetings i cant now and my online sponser has help me work to change my life for the better. I think alanon puts more emphasis on f2f sponsers for the connection that being in person brings. IF your open with any sponser and honest then it works it you work it.
kerry
__________________
Life can only be understood backwards, But it must be lived forwards
I'e had both online and ftf sponsors. Both work for me. I think some people can work with more than one sponsor. Some people never get the right sponsor. Some people put great emphasis on how much sobriety someone has.
I don't think it is cookie cutter. Different things work at different times. Right now I have an online sponsor and that works. It may not work next month but I am willing to take action if it doesn't. Its not black or white merely grey these days.