The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Me and my friend were talking yesterday and the subject trust came up. We have issue trusting, both of our lives are going great, so why do we have problems trusting. Well my problem trusting my husband is because he is one of the a's in my life. He is going to aa, so he could go back to drinking all the time any time. Right now though my life is great, no drama nothing like that. My husband doesn't cheat on me, he is always next to me in bed every night, so why do i think he is going to cheat on me. He comes home and spends all his time with me so why is there lack of trust.
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Hey everyone watch me grow. I go thru good & bad times. each day i am getting stronger.
I think for me my trust problems stem from all the A's in my life. Letting them have that power over me. Hard to explain but I think when I gave too much of myself I gave that power of me to them. So it made it difficult for me to trust them because of all the broken promises and all the pain I had felt over all the years. Found out that I was the one that had problems dealing with my belief system. Now I try and focus on me. Less effort on what he/they are or aren't doing. But again I am new at this and somedays this is a task. But everyday it does get easier, with time.
(((((((((((((nycbt)))))))))))))))) Big hug for you
Can not answer your question NYC, but just share that I do not trust my a husband at all. Even though he is sober and taking relatively good care of me right now and has been for some time. He has let me down in the past at the times I needed him the most. I have seen him do the same to others. He may do that again at any time. Just being realistic I believe. What I can do and try to do to make this better is to not critizise, question and second guess him all the time. I think it is ok to keep the fact that I do not trust him to myself as far as I can. Try to hold my tounge and take it one day at a time just as he has to
