The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I have come to realize over the past few days that I do not know the child my wife speaks of. My alcoholic/addict stepdaughter.
I am now realizing that that is part of the reason why I don't get it. I never knew the child and she has been addicted to some substance or another since she was 12. I only know the alcoholic/addict.
Now I can say, I don't know that person you are talking about. I only know the person who she is now and has been for the last 15 years. I wish I knew that other person, then maybe I would have hope for her, if I had some remembrance of a loving and caring person. Unfortunately all I have ever seen is a drunk or stoned, stumbling, mean, vindinctive, manipulative little girl in a grown up body.
Am not sure why I am posting this. This realization just came today. Maybe I am hoping that I am not the only person who has ever been through this experience, to only know someone as an addict or alcoholic.
Look forward to hearing more
Annie
__________________
Two things: 1. Recovery is a process, not an event.....and.... 2. You only get to go around once. Leave em laughing and make it worth your while
in my experience Annie, I don't know my A as him anymore either. I don't really remember who he was before. I have known him since I was seventeen, I am fifty three now.
I am so sorry for your stepdaughter, she is so very sick.
Hoping you can keep growing in alanon and take care of you.
I'm fairly new but my thought is that the more you work the program and read other ppls esh, the more you will realize that this is an illness and I think you will be able to have compassion for your step daughter. I have an A son but I feel compassion for all who inherited this terrible disease and the people that have to live with it.
Glad you found Al-anon. Its hard not to harbor resentment. I struggle all the time. Hopefully, working the steps will give me the tools that I need to have the serenity I so desperately want. From what I have heard, it's guaranteed to work so long as you work the steps completely and continue to practice the principles. I wish courage, strength, and hope for all of us as we deal with this.
