Thank you Debbie for your service and all shares. This was instrumental in turning a dreaded outing into a fun experience. This morning we were going shopping for Christmas/birthday presents (my spouse and I are December babies). I was focused on the many ways he gets on my nerves when we shop together. Then I remebered I hate shopping with anybody! So after meditating on today's share, I created a plan, asked for his input, and ignored my critical spirit. We didn't waste time browsing- we knew what we wanted, which stores carried it and stuck to our list and budget. Are conversation centered around the beautiful decorations and fond childhood memories. The bonus was getting take out from our favourite Chinese restaurant (yum). By pushing aside mental criticisms which are a breeding ground for resentments, we had fun and learned new things about our histories. Thanks MIP .

Wonderful posts! I not only mentally criticize in the moment, I can predict and already be in a snit before an event even begins.  Focus on me, focus on me!

El

Thank you very much DM, and all above for your ESH...

Love this page, so powerful: "By changing myself, I truly can change the world."

THAT, is the 'magic' of Alanon...the superpower that is available to all who are willing...Grateful

Thank you {{TT}} for your insight and ESH, it is very true for myself as well to humbly soul search

for the honest reasons for my actions and always try to remember that my way cannot always be

the right way for anyone else!! My motives are very important and really question myself when I

feel I need to say something difficult to anyone. Today, while I was at a doctors appointment I had

to be honest with the nurse and APRN because just being there with certain (unprofessional) office

staff actually raised my BP and once I voiced my displeasure (which was very difficult for me to do)

my BP came right down. I really did not want to say anything for fear that it would get those two

in trouble, but it was admitted by the APRN that they were recognized as "stressed out." It is

unfortunate that this is a cardiologist's office and these individuals are counteracting the treatment

that the office is essentially there to treat!!! I could not allow them to do this to me anymore and

have looked into another doctor's practice for future BP checks and medication management. I

questioned myself numerous times before I just finally had to say something, but still found it

difficult to do because I do not walk in these individuals shoes, but I cannot let them affect my

health either. They are just very condescending and rude when I was first put on medication and

it had to be changed and then dosages needed to be tweaked, in the mean time it was scary

because the BP was spiking (with severe headaches) and then tanking to the point of wanting

to pass out and ended up in the ER. All is well now, but I have enough medical background to3

know how to handle the issues I had to go through. So long story short, I am thankful for Al-Anon/

MIP and my HP's guidance!!

And ..... Happy Birthday to Daffodils and your husband this month!!