The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I have been here nearly a year posting on this board reading everyone's post and relating it to my crazy life. I realized today, i am further along on the path of recovery than i give myself credit. During the last year, i have left and returned twice, once being gone for over a month. Now, last week my husband my A cried ( again) told me that he wanted to work on himself and our marriage and went to the dr who changed his RX. He called me at work to tell me this and that he wouldnt be drinking anymore at least not for awhile as the medication said NO DRINKING. I didnt respond ( big change ) .. Now today, here we are 6 days later and he is drinking. Deep inside i knew that he couldnt stop.. Not possible, i use to get so mad not understanding WHY.. Now, i understand that he cant.. Not without help, and although he knows he has a problem isnt ready to face it. So, I laugh, because I knew it was coming.
Progress yes, it doesnt mean that I am not dissapointed it just means that I knew that it wouldnt last. Just living one day at a time not sure what tomorrow will bring..Just letting go and letting GOD.. I just pray that he continues to give me the strength to continue to let God control my life and HIS...
another progress is that I am as addicted to him as he is to alcohol. I am working on that too, he now has his own account handling his share of the bills. I no longer control his money or his actions.. ( more progress for me :)
Thanks, for everything this board has given me during the last several months.. Thanks for the understanding that only an alanon friend can give, thanks for the friendship and for not judging me, for all of the alanon phrases that help me thru difficult days and for the sounding board to vent and share..
This site is a blessing isn't it. It to has helped me so much.
I was waiting for my "A" to relapse again, something in my gut told me it would happen. I was supportive and didn't take his inventory. He relapsed last night. I am at peace with it now because I am still healthy and still working on me.
Keep working it.
Much Love,
__________________
"Today's problems can not be solved if we still think the way we did when we created them" -Albert Einstein
Your posting on your progress helped me see that even though I FEEL like I am not making progress, "feelings aren't facts" and I also have made progress.
