Good morning everyone-

Todays reading is a look at how despite our best efforts, we may be repeating habits and behaviors instilled in us during childhood.  The writer describes growing up in an alcoholic home and learning to deal with life in unhealthy ways. Specifically the writer did not know how to manage uncomfortable feelings, so stuffed them down deeply inside.  The writer began to make life changes as the first 3 steps were applied, yet still wanted to find the root of any and all destructive behaviors.  The writer decided to practice the slogan first things first along with the 4th step of taking personal inventory.  Guilt, shame, resentments and fears along with associated behaviors were rooted out and released through working the steps.

I think its interesting to work on the behaviors we learn in childhood. On one hand, we are at the mercy of the environment in which we are born and grow, on the other at some point that upbringing needs to be reckoned with in some way. Being the youngest in a large family, I received a type of attention that I learned to seek out.  I know theres a competitive nature related to the big family, and one way this was expressed was trying to get a (last) laugh.  Sometimes it was genuinely about trying to make one another laugh, but other times the sarcasm associated with jabs would veer into meanness (at least I have caught myself in this act). Like the writer, doing a personal inventory and working on these old ingrained behaviors has helped me make changes in my life.

Whenever I feel overwhelmed, the reminder from the thought for the day is helpful: how can I apply first things first to clarify a confounding task today?

I hope everyone enjoys a peaceful Sunday.

Mary