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Post Info TOPIC: Courage to Change April 14


~*Service Worker*~

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Courage to Change April 14


Hello MIP! 

Posting quite a bit late today - thanks for your patience! 

In today's share, the author reflects on how, as many of us recover in Al-Anon, we develop a heightened awareness of our thoughts. In this way, we are able to notice when our thinking begins to be distorted. Some call this distorted thought "stinking thinking".  The author suggests that being aware of and dismissing negative thoughts is not enough, and suggests instead that we replace negative thoughts with positive ones. The author also shares that they find it useful to listen to audio tapes, attend a meeting, or connect one-to-one with another Al-Anon members when they find themselves in a negative state of thought. 

Today's Reminder: Today Im going to pay close attention to what I tell myself. If necessary, Ill stop in mid-thought, start over, and replace negative illusions with positive truths.

Today's Quote: What we teach ourselves with our thoughts and attitudes is up to us. . . . In All Our Affairs

-------------------------

I like the topic of today's reading. I've found that what I think determines a lot in my life. It impacts how I think about myself, how I feel about situations, and whether or not I feel capable to make positive change in my life. Keeping my thoughts positive and affirmative helps me to show up as the person I want to be. 

 



__________________

Skorpi

If you are depressed, you are living in the past. If you are anxious, you are living in the future. If you are at peace, you are living in the present. - Lao Tzu



~*Service Worker*~

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Happy Wednesday Skorpi and MIP. Thank you for your service and the daily. I am one who needs to be really cautious about my 'first thoughts' regarding news, life, events, etc. It's almost automatic (still) for my brain to jump to a reactive thought/response. Only through this program and the tools have I seen progress in pausing long enough to pray before I proceed. This allows me to either see for myself that my thoughts are not helpful, productive, healthy, etc. and to find better/different ways of viewing the situation/thinking.

Betty always used to say, "Changed attitudes aid recovery." This is so, so true for me. When I just add a little bit of gray to my black/white thinking and focus more on what is vs. what I think it is, I'm amazed how differently I see/adapt/respond to things.

Hope all had a great day - golfed here and am preparing for a few days of roof replacement pounding. I had my first vaccine shot yesterday and am happy to report no side effects. Love and light to all...

__________________

Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging.  Pause before assuming.  Pause before accusing.  Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret.  ~~~~  Lori Deschene

 

 



~*Service Worker*~

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\

Good share, Skorpi and Iam... aww

aww Stinking thinking, poor me's, pity pot... ...on a good day I called it "the paralysis of analysis.

    It is nasty and insidious- for me at least. Just as the disease is. To call out those thoughts take me

    time and patience. Regular sharing at regular meetings is a great aid. Coming to a meeting- which

   I can attend daily, if i need to- and where there is no egg-timer on the table- is a great asset. I did

  have to discipline myself, somewhat, around the nature of my sharing. Not a people pleasing move-

 but a desire to "fit in". To the point of not being scapegoated, anyway. biggrin  

Where real learning is possible. smile ...

Thanks. 



__________________

Each Alanon member is my teacher.                                                                                                                  



~*Service Worker*~

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Hi Skorpi, thanks for today's reading, your service and ESH.

Greetings to IAH and David, thank you as well for sharing.

I used to brew/worry over everything, since Al-Anon I have been using

the tools and steps now for close to 8 years and with each year it only

gets easier to stop and think/replace with thoughts of gratitude.

It is so lovely indeed!! Having Al-Anon and MIP membership is such

a wonderful bonus to be able to listen/share and talk issues out as

well. {{HUGS}}


__________________

"Forgiveness doesn't excuse bad behavior, but does prevent bad behavior from destroying your heart" ~ Unknown

Debbie



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Thank you Skorpi for your service, and thank you Iam, David and Debb for your shares.

Tracking negative thoughts is the challenge of my life.
I found that I can't just replace them like that, I need more to dialogue with that part of me that generates them, see where she has learned them, from who, are they real, how can she be so sure, and then bingo! light bulb moment, no she is not sure, but at that time when she learned that, she needed that belief to survive ... but not now, not anymore. So right now, I can replace that belief with the truth.
The truth is always positive because my HP wants me to live happily and no matter what happens, one day good will come out of it ...

Thank you for reading me,

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~*Service Worker*~

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Coming to this late, but thank you Skorpi for your service and to all above who shared their thoughts.

I remember when I realized that deep inside, I was a "negative" person. I really believed the worst. At least in myself. I had taught myself to be two people - the outward positive person, and the person inside who secretly believed all was going to hell-in-a-handbasket. I was in denial that the negative Nellie inside was affecting me at all.
Al-Anon has helped me to not only Pause before I react, but also to treat myself with the respect I deserve! It wasn't easy at first... replacing negative thoughts with positive ones. It has taken a lot of practice, and continued diligence.

Last week, my son told me in conversation, "Well, I am glad that you can have such a positive viewpoint on this." I kind of laughed b/c if he only knew... if he only knew. LOL!
But my response to him was, "Son, I have found that believing in the Good (whatever the subject) is just more peaceful than always focusing on the Bad/Negative. It is all about what I have actual control of... and me worrying myself about what may occur, is not controlling any outcome."

David, I too, love that there is no "egg-timer" here! Sometimes, my thoughts are jumbled, and I need a little time to make myself understood!

Working my way to the end of the workweek... one more day to go!

&



__________________

"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend

"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness."  Mary Oliver

 

 

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