The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Posting tomorrow's daily tonight as I am volunteering in the morning followed by golf in the afternoon. The reading discusses how the traditions of Al-Anon Family Groups help us learn how a healthy family group functions. When problems involving others arise, we can turn to the Traditions for guidance.
Our traditions make it possible for us to be part of a group that encourages growth. We learn to detach, to respect other people's privacy, and to find some release from our need to dominate and control. For the author AFG became like family. Living no longer meant surviving from crisis to crisis - instead growth, change and acceptance are more the norm.
Reminder: Because the Traditions are based on spiritual principles, they often apply to personal matters as well as group concerns. When I get tangled up in problems with other people, the Traditions can offer guidance and perspective.
Quote from Al-Anon Spoken Here: "The Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions embody principles that lead to recovery and personal growth, helping each of us to discover and become the person we want to be.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I can relate to living a life that felt like I ran from crisis to crisis. I've often referred to feeling like I was perpetually reactive, over-stressed because nothing felt stable, organized, orderly, etc. I know now because of Al-Anon that how I react or respond to other people, places and things is a choice. I do not have to embrace OPP (Other People's Problems), I can be supportive and yet have boundaries.
I also recall feeling very alone and lonely before Al-Anon. I did not really consider that others were also deeply affected by A(s) in their family/friends. I do value my relationships in recovery deeply and many know me better than my family knows me. It's so comforting to know that I am not alone, and if/when I reach out, there are willing people always there to help me.
I am grateful for the program, the steps, the traditions and all those who keep showing up to offer ESH. Make it a great day tomorrow all - that's my plan!!
__________________
Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Thanks IAH for your service and great share. In my early alanon days, I just was in a hurry to get everything fixed. I did not have patience for steps, slogans, traditions, and concepts. In thinking back I had just been in too much pain for too many years. Whose fault? MINE! I continue to grow into my adult years and can find value and worth in traditions. When it's the meeting week that we do a tradition, I can now see the relevance for the greater good and for me individually. Always grateful.
I do believe that coming here and being part of a group is teaching me so much. I am learning to take in other thoughts,feelings and opinions and deciding whether they work for me or if I even accept them or not. It in return is helping me do that in real life too.
Not always though,but at least I am becoming more aware of my own flaws and wanting to change them. The path to change begins with awareness,right?
AH and I had an argument over Biden falling on Air Force One stairs. He was saying it was his own fault for rushing so fast and I thought it was his knee that gave out on him and felt bad for him. It seems so silly now that we actually argued over it. We both watched the same video and had such totally different perspectives.I should have just respected his right to his own point of view instead of trying to get him to agree with me.
I have been slacking on this program some lately because I haven't felt well(from Covid Vaccination) and it makes me realize times like this are when I need to delve even deeper to keep me sane.
Thank you Iamhere for your service. Sounds like you have a busy Saturday full of purpose and fun!
Sunnyfrogs - I am also learning to allow others to have their own opinions... even if they differ from mine. I understand now that I have zero reason to change their opinion into the same opinion as mine. I may not like their opinion, but I am showing respect of their right to have it! Yes, awareness is key! I hope you feel better from your vaccination... I had symptoms from the first shot for 2 months! But my second went by easy-peasy!
Debb - I can relate to your post about betrayal... for me, sitting in that space (always thinking about the betrayal) kept me stuck. I did not progress with my serenity. It took me awhile to become aware of that!
Appreciate you all! &
__________________
"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend
"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness." Mary Oliver
(((SF))) - I hope you feel better soon! My mother had no reaction at all from either of her shots; my father had a horrid head-ache and absolutely no energy after his for about 36-40 hours.
I have had a super busy day...fun yet busy. I do tend to sleep better after full, busy days - always a gift! (((Hugs))) to all!
__________________
Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
you said "how I react or respond to other people, places and things is a choice. I do not have to embrace OPP (Other People's Problems),"
THAT hit home for me...I let go this client as he was ALWAYS, tardy, not responsible for his books..waiting till last minute and HIS inattention and lateness was becoming, year by year MY emergency....The stress was getting to me and as I get older, that just does not work....so I told him , after many appeals to "clean up his act" and don't throw a mess at me, last minute and expect ME to get YOUR stuff out the door (income taxes et al) on time...he failed to keep his word to me to have me in there enough to keep things manageable, so I wrote him an email, wishing him well, but I can't do the stress and absorbing his problems anymore...it was hard and scary for me to do because I need the business, but I had to make a choice-----my serenity or the not so much money I made off him.....I chose ME...and I could not have done that w/out getting to a place where if it is right, my HP has got me covered
& 