The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
In the reading for Monday, 3/22, the author discusses how worrying becomes the norm. Its a habit difficult to shake off even if we know it serves no purpose. We think about yesterday and tomorrow, and miss the day we have. In alanon we can learn to free ourselves from worry, if we concentrate on a manageable bit of time.
Reminder: I will not allow myself to be swamped by thoughts of things that are past. I will not concern myself about tomorrow until it becomes my today. The better I use today, the more likely it is that tomorrow will be bright.
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I was a champion worrier. OMG, my mind raced often, usually about things I could not control, and because my A drank and drove in the past, I had many things to worry about. And especially with the drinking and driving, would an accident kill someone, bring jail, getting sued, losing the licensethis was a horrifying situation to me. And I could not fathom how an intelligent and caring human being would make this choice to drink and drive.
With my sponsor, and all the life lessons I learned in alanon, I had to focus on myself and make decisions that could best help me. I recall how ridiculous this seemed at first, because that behavior in particular could result in death, and it was out of my control. But I did itit was sink or swimI can swim. And dont ask me how but at least this behavior stopped, at least to the best of my knowledge. Alcoholism is a complicated and devastating disease when left untreated. Grateful member of alanon always.
Thank you Lyne and David. I can totally relate to your shares. I also was a champion worrier. It began with my step mom, how to please her so she would keep her hands off of me! Then having Dad as a type 1 diabetic, I was always worried about his health. Fast forward to my work life, our CEO was nicknamed "Neutron Jack". For years I worried if I'd be next to be cut. A cheating ex husband made life a "treat" (smile). A book "The Power of Positve Thinking" helped me manage my worries...until I met my AH...all chaos broke loose...then the pandemic... Thanks to Alanon, I have shifted my focus. One day at a time concept took away that anxious knot in my stomach. My eczema is gone! I still worry but at least it doesn't CONSUME me...at least I know I have the tools and 90% of what I worry about never happens or it turns out better than I expect. Thanks to HP , Serenity Prayer, and shared experience by the members. Have a a wonderful day...
I love everyone's shares! 98% of my excema is gone as well, Daffodils!! Now I know stress plays a big role in that auto-immune condition.
Have fun at the Regatta, David! I am a little jealous!
Enjoy this Monday MIP Family! &
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"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend
"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness." Mary Oliver
I've always been a big worrier,since young childhood. Back then it was worry if I would survive the night and wake up the next morning for school. Of course I don't have the same types of worries now but it's a very ingrained trait still. I can get myself all worked up baking cookies ,worrying whether I will burn them,will they turn out good,will they taste alright, etc. Lol
I am working on letting things go and turning them over to my HP. Sometimes it works and other times it doesn't. Hopefully with practice I will be able to more often.
Happy Monday MIP. Thank you Lyne for your service and the daily. Thank you all for your shares & ESH. I am a worrier and come from the same. It has taken me so much practice to shake some of it off and the only way I now to worry less is to pray more.
I have an Aunt who has passed on now who said for a lifetime, "If you're worrying, you're not praying." I found this trite and worthy of many eye-rolls as I was coming of age and experiencing life with all the challenges and what-not. Add this disease and I was on overload with worry and anxiety.
Well, as time moved on and I practiced recovery, I truly came to embrace this and believe it. Worry for me creates negativity and anxiety in me. Prayer for me calms me and typically brings me to a neutral or positive space. I do believe now that these are mutually exclusive actions - worry/prayer - and I must choose which to do.
My aunt was married to an A, had 6 kids, was abused and unable to protect the kids (my cousins). She had a difficult life, yet managed to not only survive but thrive in the face of so many odds. She was 'the one' I would go to for support and advice instead of my mother of the other 'sisters'. It wasn't because she was smarter or had more experience - it was because she was calm in the face of absolute calamity and she was always full of faith and light, no matter what was going on around her.
When I start my day the program way, and try to choose joy for the day, one day at a time, I do include prayers for faith and trust. Today, when I begin to worry and sense a possible 'spin-out', I opt for the lesser effort of prayer. It does work for me, doesn't have to be complicated and it centers me in the present. Worry for me BR (Before Recovery) truly was so, so consuming and I now can keep it at bay using our tools.
I hope all had a great day. We are to have rain overnight and all day tomorrow, so of course, I golfed today and then volunteered all afternoon. I'm a tired gal and plan to get horizontal shortly. Thank you all for being a part of my journey!! (((Hugs)))
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
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