The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Todays reading is about what we gravitate toward, what our attitudes do to perception, and the choices we can make. The writer begins by stating that we dont necessarily veer toward what is good for us, but rather what is familiar. In the writers case, negative thinking was predominant in the family so it felt comfortable and safe. The writer came to the realization that attitude affects everything. When living in an alcoholic home, attitude was consistently negative. Learning that positive choices can be made can influence things in a positive direction: going to meetings, reading alanon literature, calling a sponsor. The writer concludes that sometimes it is as simple as choosing to be positive.
The idea of runaway thoughts resonated with me. Like the writer, it is easy for me to allow a thought to become a problem to then become an exaggeration and I can find myself feeling anxious about some future circumstance that exists only in my mind! I have found a strategy that helps me that is slightly different than the writers suggestion of choosing to be positive. Sometimes when I find myself thinking of something that worries me, I will allow myself to go to the fear what is the worst outcome of whatever scenario I am thinking of? Most of the time I realize it so nothing that I couldnt find a way through, and that is helpful. I have also just allowed myself to feel the worry or sadness rather than try to combat it. I appreciate the reminder today that sometimes, as the Thought for the Day states: Life is as good as I think it to be.
Happy & peaceful Sunday to you too Mary! Thank you for your service and the daily. Thanks also for your share/ESH. I can also relate to runaway thoughts. It's so easy and natural for me to either reflect on the past or project towards the future. Depending upon my spiritual condition in the moment, I can float away to a darker place or I can embrace miracles and hope. It's unnatural for me to do the latter, but with practice, I can get there.
I've said it before and it is worth repeating - for whatever reason, my mind does not naturally go towards the light/hope/miracles. It tends to panic and try to go opposite as a first response/reaction. It's the Pause to Pray before I Proceed which helps me do better, seek healthier thoughts/attitudes and then proceed.
So much of what transpires in my days is dependent upon my attitude, outlook and the realization I always have choices. I choose, each morning, one day at a time to look for the light & joy in my world and then become willing to let my HP lead me when I should go. My faith continues to grow when I feed it. My serenity and my joy -- same, same -- essentially, what I focus on grows! I'm grateful also for the reminder to choose joy, today and each day, as best I can, one day at a time.
Off to volunteer at the golf course shortly. Make it a great day MIP family! (((Hugs))) to all!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
It's true that we gravitate towards what's familiar. When I was going through trauma therapy my therapist said "if you want to understand why your life is the way it is now you have to take a look back".
Alanon is slowly but surely helping me change old ways,old patterns and create new ways of relating to the world and others.
Therapy can help but really,the best and most helpful way(for me) seems to be growing and changing along with others that have or are walking that same path.
Thank you Mary for your service. I hope that you have been vaccinated before the powers- that- be in your state ask you to work in-person. There is one positive thing about this pandemic... it has made most people realize the importance/value of our educators!
Grateful for all who shared above... nice to know I don't walk alone.
This is one area I can point a finger directly at my FOO. I learned to expect and even anticipate the worst case scenario, directly from my father. And to some extent, it has helped me live with the addicted spouse all these years. But in reality, it is no way to live your life! Always negative, cortisol levels always high (flight or fight response)...not good for the body, long term. Al-Anon has provided an easier, gentler way to move through my life. It is why I continue to practice, even though I no longer live in the midst of the disease.
Even when free of the chaos, it took me a long time to reliably practice "Living For Today/Moment." I just love when Iamhere talks about 'Choosing joy each day." It sometimes sounds so trite, but you really can choose your level of serenity by choosing your outlook.
Rained here yesterday, so I was stuck inside... got some stuff done. Beautifully sunny today, though! So, out into the garden/yard I go!!
Choose Joy today! &
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"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend
"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness." Mary Oliver
Thank you Mary for the topic and everyone for the shares. TiredTonight hit home. I tend to minimize problems. I have a tendency to give a synopsis and omit the hellish details . Some is due to conditioning-don't air out your dirty laundry-and part is feeling guilty about betraying secrets. I suffered violence at the hands of my step mother and my true spirit was diminished and I resented my father for bringing her into our lives. I minimzed the pain of my cheating ex husband because he was not physically violent. I have met people who have suffered far more horrendous situations so I would say I could have had worse happen to me...Anyways, it's hard for me to talk about my stuff so I appreciate it when members "go there". It gives me courage to open up and risk being vulnerable so I can pick up tools to heal. I focus less on my AH and strangely enough, we get along better. I have found a meeting within walking distance and hope they will be live this week. (can't wait for some eye contact and being in the presence of others) . It's good to share/learn from AlAnon. Oh yeah, a therapist once told me in the brain, positive thoughts are like Teflon and negative like velcro -so I work hard to keep an attitude of gratitude. Have a great day.
believe it or not, I have been teaching in person all year. It has been **stressful** to say the least. Vaccinations for teachers began here two weeks ago so I have now received the (J and J) vaxx
thank you for asking, and you are right that this unique year has put lots in perspective. Eking out the last hours of weekend here! I hope you have enjoyed yours!
I am always shocked to hear this when people tell me they have been teaching all year! Whew! I am thankful you have had the "one and done" vaccine!
Blessings to ya! &
__________________
"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend
"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness." Mary Oliver
& 
Love you avatar very springtime!!