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DavidG


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A share...
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 aww I tend to dwell on the topics here- meditate on them. Absorb them.

    There was a topic last week about comparisons. For three or four days I encountered

dissociation... [numbing, or brain fog.] I rode with is until it cleared. Did not feel compelled

to get back to Step one- and start the slow climb all over again. Just a brief interlude.

The shares on this forum- the "agony aunt" ones attract a lot of attention. And rightly so.

I am impressed and proud at the responses. There was a time when many people would

share here- and never come back to see the responses. This happens much less often now.

In my own home group, here in NZ, we used to to Step One sharing if a newcomer came

to a meeting. "Why we were there." To offer ESH. And to renew our own vows, as a group

member. To remember to keep the focus on ourselves, and not others.

And sometimes I just do this- for its own sake. smile ...



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Debb


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DavidG you always make me think and smile!!

Had to look up what an "agony aunt" was, kind of a British version of Dear Abby in the States.

I guess it depends on the circumstances and who is posting, especially if it is a "newbie" then the

focus is entirely on them, like you said in a meeting when there is a newcomer, everyone wants to

make the newcomer welcome. The "agony aunt" posts are, for me, such a good way for us all

the discuss what is on our minds and learn from each other. Al-Anon is so cool. Thanks for the

share DavidG.



-- Edited by Debb on Monday 15th of February 2021 01:58:34 PM

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Debbie
Maresie888


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David

I believe we are in a new wave of recovery for those of us dealimg with these #trauma# issues. 

People are looking at issues to do an attachment disorder where  over 75% of people who come from  an abusive background have an attachment disorder. That is they are either disorganized  and/or  insecure attachment. That could be said to be #preoccupied#  Preoccupied attachment have a hard time letting go of #hurts#     They are #preoccupied,# in the relationship and generally caught up in the fight/flight mode.  According to the stastistics they remain in the fight flight mode in relationship.  They do not graduate from there 

A certain percentage of survivors have a #distant#attachment mode. They are removed, afraid of relationship anf recalcitrant 

 

A very small percentage of survivors have a#secure# form of attachment.  They have #balance# in their lives. They neither hate nor are they enmeshed in the relationships. 

 

Needless to say the issue of complex ptsd is a very difficult one..  Managing complex ptsd is a really difficult task. First some survivors have  disassociative features that are particularly overwhelming. So of course are the plethora of #triggers' that seem to have lifelong implications ...

While both the attachment and complex ptsd issues are intimidating fior me having the vocabulary to describe what I am dealing with is invaluable. 

Maresie 

 

. 



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