The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Todays reading is about maintaining serenity in our lives. The writer describes how willingly some of us hand off our serenity when encountering alcoholic behavior. In this reading it is compared to our reaction when someone asks for the salt to be passed at a meal. Not even thinking, we hand it off. Growing up in and/or living in an alcoholic home helps to condition us to pass off our serenity. We will sacrifice it, thinking we may have an impact on some way on whatever is opening with the alcoholic. Thankfully we have many resources of support in the program: readings, slogans, meetings, and a sponsor to help us learn how to maintain and share our Serenity rather than give it up.
A few weeks ago I had a reminder of what my life was like when I was living with an active alcoholic. Incredibly (to me) I noticed an initial reaction on my part was the old way, becoming immersed in the chaos. Thankfully that was brief and now, unfamiliar to me. I remembered there were many other choices for me that would help maintain my calm life! I notice that the most helpful tool when I revert to chaotic thoughts is a slogan: this too will pass, one day at a time, live and let live. A few brief words to help me get on track again, with clarity and focus.
Im grateful to know a different way is possible, and glad to have found this space, program and all of you to work on it with.
Thank you Mary for your service
Serenity or calm is a hard place for me to come from
I have to work really hard to stay there .
The alcoholic can certainly get me off kilter pretty fast .
I try to work hard to maintain a centeredness.
I am working hard not to be reactive.
Maintaining boundaries is really quite an art
I now have a new therapist
I am going to a new support group (which might bring up a lot for me)
I am also negotiating a big medical bill
That is very difficult for me.
I am going to be on a tightrope for a while
Maresie
Thank you Mary for your service and the daily. Thank you all for your shares & ESH. I spent a majority of my life on earth giving my power away to others, without even thinking about it. It is a habit that has been entrenched in my being, yet one I am working to change. Al-Anon recovery has given me the tools to change things up, and I am grateful. I just have to remember to pause and pray before I proceed - doesn't happen automatically...
I am grateful that if/when I give my power away, I can also take it back. Starting my day over or picking up a tool that helps center me is such a gift - ever reminding me that I am 100% responsible for my attitude, joy, actions, reactions, etc. I know my days go much, much better when I stay on my side of the street, put my needs first and make choices that are healthy for my recovery. That does not mean I've lost my 'less than healthy' ways - not so. Often, they are just below the surface. It does mean that I have choices always.
Happy Sunday all - taking it easy today and then watching football this evening. Make it a great day...
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
I enjoyed reading everyone's shares today... like most days, I can find a nugget or two that brings me calm and understanding.
I am just beginning to learn how I would freely give away my serenity. For me, it is important to note that Al-Anon has helped me to recognize what is Fear and what is F.E.A.R. It is a very important distinction, and one that I couldn't always identify. Thank you TT for bringing that up! Grateful that this program and the ESH of others helps me in this regard.
Playoff Day!!
Cold storm blew through yesterday, and the mountains above my house are covered in a blanket of snow! So gorgeous!
Even though my team has been knocked out of contention, I will enjoy a full day of excellent football!
Grateful to be able to see both today! &
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"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend
"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness." Mary Oliver
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