The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
To all of you no matter how you spend the holiday season, I hope you have a wonderful & peaceful experience. Sometimes we disrespect each other by not sharing the time we have to offer. I am grateful that I can be honest & upfront about how I feel & hope that others don't get offended by my posts. I am just glad that I don't have to be perfect as I am always going to be a work in progress. I know that you all understand how the disease works. Sometimes we want to please everyone neglecting our own wants & needs. I know for me w/ my husband the alcoholic in my life, I still have trouble communicating w/ him even after lots of time in sobriety. I guess it is partially because he is somewhat deaf. I have to practically yell. BTW, my late father was pretty much totally deaf. He worked on the base as a ship fitter. I guess all the noise over the years, he lost his hearing. I didn't plan on sharing all of this but I get on a tangent & ramble once in awhile.
So, here I go again, I am trying to stay on topic. My original plan was to talk about the season & the changes now that it is officially winter. I hope that we can all do something besides staying home possibly getting depressed. Some of my support system is taking a break until after the new year. I am OK w/ it but it seems unnecessary. I don't know the reasoning behind it. But for everything there is a reason & a season.
My holiday will be severely different this year due to COVID. It is raging here (after months of relative "control"), and all year I have (to quote Iamhere) chosen to be part of the solution, not part of the problem. So no family gatherings this year... especially not now.
Yes, if I dwell on it, it is a little depressing. But so far, have not had a death of anyone I know due to COVID. I understand that not everyone in this country can say this. Previously, I had lived through a Christmas where a family member died on Christmas Day. It changes things forever. So if I begin to feel sorry for myself and "what is," my thoughts immediately go towards all of those in our country whose lives will be forever changed. May their HP's bless them!
May your HP bless you as well!
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"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend
"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness." Mary Oliver
Happy Holidays Kathleen....I got a chuckle out of the 'have to yell to be heard'. My AH worked on the railroad for his entire career and he can't hear a darn thing! My father put off getting hearing aids until age 80, so I had to raise my voice to talk with him for many years. I am reminded when he first got the hearing aids, he stopped wearing both. I asked why, and he said that his hearing was 'too good' now - he could hear a fly fart on a windy day. Needless to say, I just about spit out my coffee at his remarks.
I am sending you holiday cheer and hope you have a lovely holiday season and a great Christmas. We are not gathering and I am OK with that. I'm willing to keep trying to be a part of the solution. Make it a lovely day!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Lol Kathleen... you share marks you out as an Alanon member! 
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