The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Strange topic, huh? I guess I shouldn't have brought it up I guess. But seriously, I have so many addictions & have mentioned before that I am having some caffeine withdrawals but no real headaches. It has been 4 days since I really over-indulged. This brings to a point: In early sobriety & beyond some addicts depend on coffee. I had a friend once who started bringing a gallon of H2O to every meeting. I wonder if he is still sober. But, that is another subject altogether.
Anyhow, I hope you all don't find this disturbing. As I was writing this I almost deleted this post.
God is good; one of my neighbors took me to the library so I could write this.
I told her she was a lifesaver. She laughed.
But, actually it is no way like the East Coast & beyond!
We "just" got a measurable amount or snow.
Again off topic! You all know how easy it is to do this!
I think was have healthy attachments. I was a groupaholic to Alanon for many years... and it was healthy.
I think some groups get burdened sometimes- when the members are struggling through the middle steps- all at once... but I really think this is a part of the process!
This groups always had some ready-made 12 steppers- which is a great asset. To see members coming 'through the mill' and gently nudging them-us along...
We don't have Thanksgiving here- so Christmas is the biggee... hoping y'all and yours are looking forwards- with hope- and faith... ...
Welp - I can only speak for me....I know that I have addictive tendencies and must work daily on balance/moderation. I am 'one' who when something feels good, I want that feel good feeling over and over and over again - and you can insert almost anything - alcohol, drugs, gambling, soda, sugar, chocolate, carbs, shopping, sports, exercise, etc. At one point of time or another, I have obsessed about these and many, many more 'things' that made me feel good.
Where addictive minds are a bit different than other minds - we will set aside responsible adult chores, activities, responsibilities to chase that feel-good. To a self-destructive point at the expense of others. So - my best effort is to lean into HP and seek balance between adulting and feel-good things. I do believe online addiction and social media as well as message boards can make one obsessive. I have to ask myself if 'this' (whatever this is) is keeping me from doing what I should be doing.
(((Hugs))) - interesting topic and worthy of discussion!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
I think this is a great topic. This board has been a part of my life for many years just like checking my emails. I chaired Alanon meetings here once a week for seven years until I thought it was time to let that go. Years ago, we had big Alanon meetings in chat and lots of us stayed for the meeting after the meeting to chat and help newcomers who popped into the room. I began using a timer to signal myself that it was time for me to leave and go about my day. Socializing in the MIP chatroom and waiting for newcomers to pop in for help was a convenient excuse for not putting my program into action in my own life. There were many things I didn't want to address in my life back then - uncomfortable feelings, actions I needed to take, people. This is not to say there weren't recovery gifts from my service, online meetings, message board postings or time spent chatting. It was just about realizing I needed balance concerning being online and being fully present and emotionally available for f2f experiences. I needed to learn how to use my recovery tools to navigate life, take risks to grow and live life on life's terms. I don't have enough words of gratitude for all the support I've received here at this board and the room, lessons I've learned and friends I've made - some whom I've met f2f and for John who created this site and others whose service helps this recovery experience to continue. So, I guess it's all about balance for me. It sure is handy though to have MIP on my phone any time, any place instead of tucking a daily reader in my purse and finding a private place to read it at a family gathering if things get chaotic. Thanks for the topic and for sharing this recovery journey with me. TT
-- Edited by tiredtonite on Tuesday 11th of December 2018 09:53:50 AM
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Surround yourself with people and elements that support your destiny, not just your history.
An addiction is when you have trouble resisting the urge to do something even when it's having a negative impact on your life.
If you are spending so much time on MIP that you are at risk of losing your job or it's interfering with your relationships, then yes, internet addiction can be a thing.
But if you are just spending a lot of time on MIP and it's not having any kind of negative impact on your life, then that's just a hobby. We don't say runners are "addicted to exercise" (even if they really like doing it and do it a lot) unless it goes so far that it has a negative impact on them.
Sometimes you just enjoy doing something and there is no deeper, sinister meaning -- although if you've had issues with addiction in the past, I can see how it would be hard for you to trust that you can enjoy something without it being an addiction.
As learned thru life and in college and in my profession, "a compulsion" best described an addiction for me. In alcoholism and drug addiction it goes on to include after compulsion of the mind that it is accompanied by an allergy of the body bringing out the negative outcomes and of course that description included up to and including death. MIP is not the only choice I have and make to maintain my physical, mental, emotional and spiritual health. As a former therapist I use to recommend practices that worked saving mental, emotional, physical and spiritual health...spiritual meaning intention In living. It was never associated with unhealthy conditions and just the opposite. I can and do rely on Al-Anon practices including it's use of MIP on a near daily basis. I recommend it highly. ((((Hugs))))
ginnyc - MIP = Miracles in Progress, the name of this board/site! (((Hugs)))
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
That is one point where we learn to forgive ourselves and accept we make mistakes. Early on I wouldn't do this cause I didn't know how and often slipped back into my poor me attitude until I gave it up. Here's a hug ((((hugs))))
I am not in AA as I am not a recovering/in-recovery alcoholic. I am not in any other 12-step program.
Even when I was "in it" and in the abyss, in the throws of what the disease of alcoholism and drug addiction did to me...I am not so sure I was an addict. Did I want to control? Yes. But not from an addiction perspective. Was I addicted to wanting to control? I don't think so. Others have said the same to me. Was I addicted to controlling? No. Most of my behavior, efforts, etc. -- were from a place of love, fear, desperation, etc. Sure, someone can be in that place and still have "an addiction" to wanting to control. That wasn't me.
Was I wanting to be right? Sure. Was I addicted. No. I say I was sick. I needed help. Recovery.
But, if the sickness I was caught up in, the things I was doing, my behaviors, etc. -- if that was addiction -- then yes, OK, I was addicted.
As far as this bulletin board...I do think some people are inter-dependent and co-dependent, wrapped too tight, addicted, and more of the like.
One thing I think can easily be overlooked...while it's a source of resources, and recovery...as it relates to certain aspects...it's a bulletin board. Plain and simple.
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Bo
Keep coming back...
God, grant me the serenity...to accept the PEOPLE I cannot change...the courage to change the ONE I can...and the wisdom to know it's ME...