The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I posted a couple times, but have been mostly reading. I think I'm starting to realize what my biggest problems is. I'm constantly worried about how everyone I care about is feeling and I spend all my time trying to solve their problems and make them happy.
I need to start figuring out what makes me happy and follow through on that. I need to stop doing things based on others feelings and start doing things based on mine.
It may take me awhile to get the hang of it. Old habits are hard to quit.
This past weekend I didn't hear from my SO because he was home sulking and trying to figure out how to get his life back in order. Instead of begging him to contact me or worrying myself sick I Accepted that no matter how he was feeling I needed some time to myself and took it.
It's a start. I talked to him last night and told him I don't care to spend time with him unless he's sober and wants to go to meetings.
Well done for recognising that you are responsible for fulfilling your own needs and honouring your own feelings. That's a big step. Old habits are hard to break which is why we say it's progress not perfection. I'm happy you found us and are beginning to feel the healing benefits of the program. You don't mention whether you're attending face to face (f2f) meetings yourself but I'd personally recommend them as well as the ones online. There's a lot to be said for the 'human touch'. I wish you well in your recovery.
Thanks Julia and Maria. I haven't been to f2f mtgs yet. I haven't located any in my area yet. The phone numbers that were posted by a member here were no longer in service. I'm going to try another number today. I also don't have a car yet. Hopefully by the end of this week mine will be fixed and I'll have found some meetings.
I am sure you will really like the face to face meetings. It is so different when you have live bodies to look at and to talk to :) In my area there are many to choose from so keep that in mind if you don't care for the first one. They also say it takes about 6 times to decide if you like one group too. I am glad you are here. cdb :) xoxoxoxo
