The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Good morning MIP....Today's reading talks about alcoholism being a disease. We can see that an alcoholic is ill, and not bad. When we attend Al-Anon meetings regularly, read literature, sit in open AA meetings, we gain insight into what is and what is not reasonable to expect when dealing with an alcoholic.
We also learn so much about self...we can adjust our expectations so we don't set self up for disappointWon. We see that others have good ideas, valid criticisms and noble motives in spite of having this disease.
Today's reminder -- Learning about the disease of alcoholism can help me become more realistic about a loved one's illness -- and thus to make better choices for myself.
Today's quote -- from Al-Anon Faces Alcoholism -- "I have learned techniques for dealing with the alcoholic, so that I can develop a relationship with the person behind the disease."
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Accepting alcoholism as a disease really helped me find balance between my needs, my wants and my life/relationships. As this disease is literally all around me, a choice to close off my life from those with this disease would have isolated me far more than the disease did! I have it above me (generationally), below me, beside me, across from me and well beyond. When they say it's a family disease, they often talk about the effects of another's drinking. In my family, we are extensively affected - more directly than indirectly. We really put the fun in dysfunction!
I am grateful that I learned in recovery to love and accept others exactly as they are. I am grateful that I don't have to ASSume how others behave is an assault on me. I am grateful that acceptance and surrender have brought me to a place where I can be around anyone, use this program, and enjoy the present and be of service. For me, understanding powerlessness over people, places and things has given me the freedom to just be and allow others the same.
Happy Thursday all - it was 38 degrees at softball last night - brutally cold and windy. I am grateful it's a new day and the sun is shining! Today is our wedding anniversary - 27 years. This would NOT BE without recovery in Al-Anon! We will be celebrating as we do each day - my guy is headed to the golf course and I'm headed to the fields this evening for games. I do not expect a card, flowers, present or anything - as that's just not how we roll. We are more likely to give a "High 5" as it works for us, just for today.
Make it a great day!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
A disease? How did they "catch" it? Oh by choosing to drink!
Is there a cure? yup... stop choosing to drink. Change the behavior.
Thats the problem with "alcoholism is a disease" mantra.
Good Morning IAH I had DIFFICCULTY ACCEPTING THE TRUTH THAT ALCOHOLISM WAS A DISEASE UNTILL IT WAS POINTED OUT TO ME THAT THE "AMA" RECOGNIZED IT AS A DISEASE BECAUSE IT MET THE MEDICAL CRITERIA FOR A DISEASE.
This information helped me to accept the fact that I was powerless over the disease and learn to keep the focus on myself and my attitudes. Picking up the tools offered by alanon I learned how to live life with compassion and love without trying to control the universe . Thanks for your service
Awesome point Betty - I didn't 'need' that simply because I had already survived the active disease and the painfully long path of recovery from it. What you point out that definitely helped me greatly whenever my crazy-brain thinking considers disease or choice. (((Hugs)))
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
THe bit of this reading I am struggling with it "having a relationship with the person behind the disease". At the moment my situation is drinking wed-friday; tapering sat/sunday, clean monday, tuesday (if I'm lucky) and then back to drinking. I don't get a chance to see the person behind the disease, there is just the disease currently. And this says more about my situation and my need to change and leave the relationship than it does a criticism of the reading. I don't feel I am having a relationship here because there the disease is too powerful in him at the moment.
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"To change the world, start with one step. However small, first step is hardest of all" Dave Matthews Band
Good afternoon MIP family. Thank you IAH for the topic of alcoholism as a disease and for your service. I arrived at the alanon doors angry, confused and in total denial that I had anything to do with this family dis-ease. Thank God I was lead to the patient and experienced arms of a loving family group who supported me and gave me the tools to grow in the right direction. My family of origin never talked about anything painful, they either numbed them with alcohol or they stuffed them down into depression... The baffling thing about this dis-ease is not realizing that I was affected by others behavior. I didn't really see my part until our children grew and also started acting out, they are really great mimics of their parents behavior. One is a RA as is his Dad and the youngest seems to be climbing out of the rabbit hole as I progress in climbing up the stairs from my depression. If I take too long a break I slip back to step 1 AGAIN.
