The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I have been busying myself with an organizational project. This requires me to go through mountains of old paperwork and pictures. As I sort through these pictures I find myself looking at the ones of our AS with thoughts of "this was BEFORE he got sick" or "Look at his eyes. All lies." I feel so ANGRY towards the disease for stealing our son. I am immaturely, irrationally, and pettishly angry at "him" for being a LIAR in the beginning, for not fighting harder. Now, it is just a way of life for him, but when I look at the pics of him at the *very* beginning stage, in the first few months of "deciding" to do drugs/huff/drink I feel robbed of our "real son". Man, do I need a meeting, or what???
It's difficult as I feel the disease creeos up and progresses without people realising how bad it actually is and I've realised since my husbamd that there are an awful lot of people who drink loads and don't actually think it's too bad. It's frightening in some ways.
The disease tool over from your son and it is going to take work from your son to overtake the disease and the will power to fight it.