The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
does anyone have any Al-Anon approved documentation or literature on this slogan? If so perhaps they can send me to anlinl or the area. I want to share this as a topic in my group meeting however any information that I google sends me to the point of origin and i am not certain I can explain this slogan clearly without using or applying religion because that was the origional source. We all know thats not acceptable. Thank you for any info
Steve - I heard this phrase way before I ever got to recovery. I suspect it's been 'borrowed' for years for a variety of purposes. I have heard it in AA, Al-Anon and Co-Dependent meetings as well as in other settings (spiritual retreats, bible discussions, etc.)
I did a quick google search related to recovery and came up empty....however there's tons of information on the origin and intention - just not directed at 12 Step recovery. Good Luck!!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Hello Steve welcome i have heard this slogan many times but never identified it with an Alanon principle. In fact. I find the saying very upsetting as it seems to set me apart and makes me special, stating that I have god's grace but the other poor people do not.
To me this is passing judgment on another"s spiritual journey for which I have no information except that they are suffering. After all facing and overcoming challenges is what life is all about..
Take what you like and leave the rest.
Here is a list of slogans I have heard at meetings
Slogans in a Poem by Coach Papa
First Things First - I have heard it said - Be Honest With yourself, - get out of your head - You can Feel Good -About Saying "No" - Keep Coming Back to - Talk And Grow - Easy Does It - sounds real nice - If you Keep It Simple - you don't roll the dice - Live And Let Live - Brings it back to you - They're in recovery, - you are, too - What's to Be will Be - So, Let Go & Let God - Just wait and see - That one Day At A Time - Is more than a phrase - In Al-Anon, - it's the phrase that pays - Think! Listen And Learn - or watch bridges burn - Keep An Open Mind, - Now it's your turn - Is your serenity worth it - Just, Fake It 'Till You Make It! - I am pretty sure, You can - Cause, How - important is it? - In time, you will understand - It's true, we're all different, - But, together we can make it - If you feel that you can't, - Then, once again, fake it - When you let it begin with me - The fog will raise, - the sun will shine - Your eyes will see - Slogans are there - For you to use - Say one every day - So you don't sing the blues - It works when you work it - We say and it's true - We're all here to help - But your recovery is up to you.
Thanks for the reminder Steve and I know that wasn't your intent in coming and asking and the idea of "There but for the grace of God go I" is a real daily reminder on how and when the grace of God arrived and touched my life and I became fully aware that HP wanted(s) me sane and sober. I have steep reminders of what my life was like when I didn't make use of Gods grace. ((((hugs))))
I'm not sure if this is alanon. Don't think I've read it anywhere in alanon but I remember thinking it was powerful and helped me move away from judging the alcoholic in my life and having compassion. For me this meant don't think your better than anyone else you could easily have been a person with the drink problem. The difference between me and the drinker is a very fine line so I need to have compassion and kindness and treat others like an equal. For years I felt way above the drinker.
While I have heard this, I also don't believe it's "Alanon". For me, it serves as a reminder to strengthen my relationship and trust my HP for things that are not in my power.
Religion discussed... please do not read further if you are offended by religious discussion.
Where I live, I have been exposed to this wording since childhood. I have also relied upon it in my own life quite a bit. The meaning, as taught to me, is that ... were it no for the Grace of God, it could be me in the same situation.... Basically, for me (and the people who have shared this teaching with me over the years), we should not judge others and their conditions because we are just as likely to have the same problems as the person we are judging. The Grace of God in this context is referring to thanking God that I was not born with the same compulsion to drink alcohol in the same way as the alcoholic. Judge not, least ye shall be judged. I have been taught to understand that I have my own issues, as well. I am Blessed not to be alcoholic. It could so easily have been me living that same life. Fortunately, God has blessed me by not having me face that particular burden.
I think we can look at this in so many ways, but that religion will always be the biggest part of this statement. I personally find that God is the only true Higher Power for me, however others, or people of other religions, may use another term for God. I personally could not use this as a teaching instrument in a setting where it would cause conflict or feelings of anger in others, however, I find it very acceptable in personal and/or religious situations...so much so, that I have raised my child to believe very much in the overall premise.
When she was younger, I would never allow the word fat to come out of her mouth (in reference to a human). As a child, I was extremely thin, but as an adult, I have struggled with weight. Having often felt the sting of painful words (mostly my own self judgment), I wanted her to understand how her words could hurt (or help) others. I would use There, but fore the Grace of God, go I to help explain...by saying that some people have conditions they were born with and cannot help themselves. You are blessed to be given a healthy body and mind and you have a responsibility to use that blessing to help others and not to hurt them. Making fun of, or judging, others is wrong. It could just as easily have been you born with this condition.
I also reminded her, and still do..on occasion, that I have done many, many wrong things myself...such as drinking and driving (in my very much younger years), however, I was simply blessed that I didnt wreck and hurt someone else (or even myself). So, it could just as easily have been me who was .... (fill in the blank... i.e. in jail, killed, disfigured, going to prison, alcoholic, extremely poor, homeless, or anything else you can imagine here...). I am thankful to God that he protected me and others when I was unwilling or unable to protect myself. Some people call it luck...I call it God.
There, but for the Grace of God, go I can be explained in non religious terms as...be careful when judging others because it might just as easily be you people are sitting in judgment of....nobody honestly chooses to get cancer (or any other disease or infirmity) and nobody honestly chooses to be alcoholic. Thank God, cancer can be cured or can go in to remission and Thank God Alcoholism can, as well.
This is just my two cents. It is not written to offend non-believers or others of different religious beliefs. I humbly ask that people who do not agree with religion, or religious discussion, please disregard my contribution without anger or further discussion.
Getting back to your first posting Steve- about religion. Some groups will forbid any discussion of religion.
In my local group is was okay- and groups do vary and apply Tradition 4.
When we look at Tradition 10 it is Alanon itself which does not ally itself with any outside opinion. Individual members are entitled to have their own opinions.
There is a distinction here. In my family home discussion of religion and politics was forbidden. In other homes it was encouraged.
So, along with emotions, I always felt that having thoughts and opinions was important, was healthy.
Forcing my own opinions onto other people, is a big no-no. Being divisive and argumentative- ditto.
So I think there is a balance here.
I really appreciated your share, Doing-my-best. I thought it was well in keeping with the Alanon Traditions.
i've heard this slogan before as a topic in meetings .. if i find a reading or something i will post.
as far as how far should meetings be able to go .. meetings should always remain 'free from 'control 'dominance 'force of 'any kind or on 'any level .. as long as we use conference approved literature. if it's not free it's Not unconditional Love, but that can and does Only happen in meetings with personal willingness inside us to work the traditions and search 'every area we are 'offended by .. the honest problem is many times we Refuse to keep our minds and hearts open or aren't able possibly through trust issues
much respect in my sharing for all .. serenity wishes too
-- Edited by MeTwo2 on Sunday 18th of February 2018 11:26:25 PM
Thanks for sharing that. It is a slogan used in AA but it is also used in Alanon. In fact, in the CAL(Conference Approved Literature) book How Al-Anon Works, on page 67, it talks about that slogan. I pull it out of my god box a lot and it reminds me that if not for the grace of my Higher Power, I'd be dead right now.
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Not all my days are priceless, but none of them are worthless, anymore.
This slogan is in the CAL, How Al-Anon Works book, therefore it is definitely an Al-Anon slogan reminding us that, but for the grace of God, we could be an alcoholic.
I used to be terrified, of saying or using some saying that was not CAL. That sense of terror originated from my FOO.
In this group we read from all three readers virtually on a daily basis. And there is a lot of stuff in there, I acquired over the years.
The drill I was taught- was that if our topic was really getting off-beam- someone in the group would have a quiet talk with me.
I have seen a few people banned for petty things. And me too- something that wrecked the group. And also from one of the other MIP groups- for something I said about Alanon.
In the very early days of Alanon the AA Big Book had chapters for family.
Some people might refer back to them- for the basics. But generally we would not use the AA BB today.
"How important is it..." is a slogan that applies here.
This group has a solid base. Members reflect a variety of viewpoints- which is a strength. ... ...
Hi Wolfie 55. On reading the sharings, I wanted to say Thank You for finding it in How Al-Anon works, I am a long term member, and have heard of that Slogan many times through out my journey of Al-Anon. I knew it was some where, but where, I knew not. So you have saved me a lot of looking.
To me, it means Gratitude, compassion for others, and helps me an awful lot when dealing with the Disease within my Family members. Also, it helps me to stick up for some of them, when the judgement, anger, and finger pointing starts by others who have no compassion, and understanding of the Disease and how it works. and the damage to some who are suffering because of this disease.
It brings it back to the reality of things, and hopefully, can make some people, stop and think.
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I used to be terrified, of saying or using some saying that was not CAL. That sense of terror originated from my FOO.
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