The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Thanksgiving is big in the USA and Canada. Today is Waitangi Day, here in AoNZ, our national day.
What mention will be made, of Alanon, or the 12 step movement? Nothing- really. But right here and now there is a connection, with this share. ...
Living in the present was always hard for me. Impossible. Group work bought me so far. I needed professional help. I needed help when I was 9; when I was three. When I was 17; and again at age 20.
When I was 15 I was 12th stepped along with a class of boys, at my school. Just a general 12th Step from An AA member. It sowed a seed.
At age 20 I went to my first AA Alanon open meeting. I went there because I wanted to help alcoholics. Not a bad motive. After the meeting I was taken aside by a young woman and she talked with me about Alanon. It must have been something I said.
I did not see the connection then. With my need, rather than other people's.
Latterly, I realised that in my country, in my world, and with my budget- I did not really have access to professional help. I had tried very hard- with the higher power stuff, and with understanding addiction. I read and studied rabidly. So I joined the ACA group here, within the MIP family clubhouse.
I was able to do multiple shares. But just as importantly, I was able to make contact with members from all over the world. A great pool of talent.
At the same time I became a member of the Alanon board... was able to do a bit of revision. And just settled in here and became a regular member. Obviously I am moving into the old timer arena... but i needed some balance- some personal stability. Especially when looking at service and leadership.
So here I am! I have made friends here. Insides the rooms we see and here so much! It does create a deep enduring bond. People in the outside world will be unaware of us. But there has to be a link- to the people who need to be here too! Let us not forget the next new member!
In AoNZ, following the traditional culture, we embellish a talk with song.
Us older people also have to select one, for the occasion... not just any old thing!
That was cool! I enjoyed the song and the dance you selected. I pine for sunshine and summer weather - it's very, very cold today. I hope your day was awesome David - thanks for sharing with us!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
David, thank you for sharing your thoughts, and I hope you enjoyed your day!
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"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend
"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness." Mary Oliver
If you are depressed, you are living in the past. If you are anxious, you are living in the future. If you are at peace, you are living in the present. - Lao Tzu
Bluff is most likely the southernmost outpost of Alanon and AA. It backs onto the antarctic sea.
The uncle mentioned below was one of five brothers who served in WWII. He killed himself in 1972.
He was one of two uncles who killed themselves, in the same year.
I have cousins still in the town. When they come home from work this evening and switch on their computers they will read this memory. Of their dad.
This is pinned up on a facebook community page for Bluff.
For those who do not know paua is abalone.
Learning about life in Bluff.
My grandmother's house overlooked the new harbour. I good place to see the new harbour being built. The first morning after arriving in Bluff I would make a bee-line for my uncle and aunts place up in Bann street. My uncle was an oysterman and me and dad were taken out early one morning to spend a day on the boat.
My uncle would always take me aside and give me a feed when I arrived. Even when it was not dinner time. I asked him what a piece of rubber tyre was doing in his fridge. He told me it was paua. cousin Helen told me that he would dive for paua off Ocean Beach. He would light a fire from driftwood to keep warm afterwards.
I asked my uncle if he harvested muttonbird. He said no, and explained why. Here, at his kitchen table I was learning what is was to be a New Zealander. About respect, boundaries and identity.
One highlight in Bluff was going to sea scouts with my cousin Brent. I come from Central Otago and the sea was foreign to me. We traded fruit for oysters... in those days everybody traded in food- from the sea, the freezing works, and the land.
Thinking of the day yesterday- everything today is far more visible... about here we sit, and stand... so much to be grateful for... so much to be proud of.
He iwi kotahi tatou. We are all one people. Each one a little different. In times to come we will embrace each other, and our beliefs and values.
So sorry for your grief and sadness David....I love your story of coming of age in Bluff! Thanks for sharing with us....(((Hugs)))
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
David what an unexpected gift you have brought here I am grateful and love it. It reminds me much of my own cultural upbringing and the events which bring color to my life from birth to now. I understand more clearly why Akua told me to come home that being because my mana, my spirit was born here and it is indelible. I want to understand more about the Maori culture...the dance the language and such. The Maori were a part of my early culture as we joined cultures with other Polynesian cultures. I lived for a while with the Samoans and some with the Tongans all the while being Hawaiian Aupuni.
When I found Al-Anon I also found that my culture was practiced in the rooms...The sharing and caring and love and support.
Right now I find myself driven to know more about your culture along with mine. I remember in the rooms of Al-Anon coming to the understanding during the fellowship shares, "I know this...this is how I was raised". So spiritually awesome. Mahalo Piha. ((((hugs))))
-- Edited by Jerry F on Tuesday 6th of February 2018 07:41:55 PM
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