The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I am new to Alanon. i am struggling terribly depression anger resentment. my husband went to rehab sept 2016 to mid november 2016, to get off his fentanyl patch due to severe work place accident, he is alcoholic. angry drunk. I also live with 2 of my 4 teenagers. my daughter was raped in 2014 and been downhill spiral ever since. drugs alcohol abusive relationships, arrested numerous times. my third child son who is close to my daughter in trying to save her got himself wrapped up in drugs etc.
i feel like i am living on egg shells daily, i dont trust them and i am constantly waiting for the next bomb to go off.
recently my husband started drinking again, 3 beer 4 times a week roughly. i have told him im very unhappy he says i am much better then i was. says i need to support him go to alanon get marriage counselling.
i feel trapped i love them all so much, do everything to support them all, make sure get them to dr appt, psychiatrist appointments everything.
Oh dear! My heart breaks for you. The best I can suggest is to find face to face Al Anon meetings. After that, I say continue to come here and read and read some more. You are not alone. The path you walk is familiar to so many who have gone before you.
I was trapped for so very long. I walked on eggshells for 20 years. I get it. You are in survival mode. I get that, too. Hugs and lots of support to you tonight!
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Never grow a wishbone where your backbone ought to be!
Hello, Welcome to Miracles in Progress. The first step in Alanon it that "We admitted we were powerless over our alcoholism and that our lives had become unmanageable." You seem to have met that step already. The second step is that " We came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity." If you can learn how to lean on your higher power it can give you the strength and wisdom to start coping with the insanity that alcohol and drugs bring into our lives. My son was a teenager, 14-15, he did not drink but he was bipolar. I was able to get him a behavior specialist that would come to my home to work with him. That really saved us. It has to be hard when they are using. Alanon teaches us how to take care of ourselves, so we can be healthy in our bodies and spiritually. That way we are more capable of helping the people we love too. We can be with and learn from others like ourselves. I hope things get better, keep coming back!
-- Edited by shrnp on Thursday 6th of April 2017 07:08:08 AM
Hi Jenn You are not alone. Alcoholism is a dreadful, progressive, chronic disease over which we are powerless. You didn't cause it, you cannot control it and you cannot cure it. Alcoholism affects everyone it comes in contact with and that is the reason that Al-Anon was founded. Al-Anon is a recovery program for family members who need support, compassion and understanding as well as new tools to live by. In living with the insanity of the disease of alcoholism, many of us developed negative coping mechanisms that no longer work. As an after thought- AA members make 12 Step calls, so a call to the AA Intergroup office asking if they will come to your home to discuss the AA program and principles is a terrific option.
Al-Anon holds face-to-face meetings in most communities and the hotline number is in the white pages. I urge you to attend. It is here that I broke the isolation caused by living with the disease found people who understood as few others can and developed new constructive tools to live by
Please search out meetings and attend. You are not alone and you are worth it.
(((Jenn))) - I too send warm welcomes to you. I've really got nothing to add beyond Al-Anon saved my sanity - I too recommend you seek out and attend some local meetings. Sending positive thoughts and prayers your way!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
