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Miracles In Progress 12 Step Recovery Forums -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Looking for a sponsor
Post Info TOPIC: Looking for a sponsor
horselover58


Veteran Member

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Posts: 69
Date:
Looking for a sponsor
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Hi, I am looking for a sponsor. Hoping to find another woman who has an active alcoholic husband. It is a different life living with an active spouse. I live is a small farming community, the closest Alanon meetings are 20 miles away, plus I work evening shift that makes it doubly hard to get to f2f meetings! I do have one in particular that I go to as often as I can. Most of the people who go work days. I do have a sponsor, but due to our conflicting schedules and distance, we don't get to talk as often as we probably should. No fault to either one of us, it is just the way our lives are. I do come to MIP meetings as often as I can! Anyone interested can email me : punkadoo13033@yahoo.com . (That was my dear cats name, Punk!)I really appreciate this. Thank you,Debbie



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Ria


Senior Member

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Posts: 215
Date:
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Hi horselover. Sorry, not offering my services as I'm also looking for another sponsor. Just wanted to commend you on reaching out for help. I wish you well and hope you find that 'special someone'. God bless all sponsors!

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To thine own self be true.
QOD


~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 739
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I just wanted to respond.  I am not a sponsor, don't even know what qualifies someone as that.  I am dealing w/my husband who has his own battle w/inner demons.  I just wanted to let you know that you are not alone. God Bless. :)


QOD



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horselover58


Veteran Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 69
Date:
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Hi Maria,


Thank you for responding. I am very slow with my response to say the least. I felt I had made such progress, but things have gone downhill lately. My husband is an active A. He continues to spend his free time with his drinking buddies. Justifying it by saying "that's what buddies do." I told him, no "that's what alcoholiocs do." I know for a fact, because I ask women who are married what thier husbands do & if they spend their spare time with their buddies. The answer was "no." That is because their hubby's aren't A's.


any way, I'm rambling. But I can't take this any longer. The marriage is DEAD! I think I deserve more than he is capable of giving me. He's claims he has changed, but last night was proof he hasn't. He CANNOT because he is in denial.


I am making plans. Maybe have a buyer for my 3rd horse, Mohegan. I will find out soon. I will keep the money safe away from him. We are having trouble with our house, foundation is in desperate need of repair. I have a list of people to call to take care of the problems. I am not sure I want to stay here, bad memories with him. On the other hand, the mortgage is very cheap. Plus I have my beloved pet cat, Punk buried out back. The invisible fence system for the dogs, the fence for the horses is up. All this would be major pain & expense to do somewhere else.


I will sell what I can & take care of the house. Then I will decide what to do. I am not telling him I sold Mohegan, he doesn't have to know. In the states, marraige is considered a partnershp 50/50. That was what my lawyer told me 2 yrs. ago when I filed for divorce. I was not emotionally ready back then, not sure if I am now, not sure if anyone ever is "ready." Even if they are the one who starts the proceddings. All I do know is I can't live this way anymore, I don't am tired of living with a man who puts friends & beer above me.


I have been in Alanon 4 years now, the last 2 have been stready. I have a great f2f group I attend on a pretty regular basis. My work schedule doesn't allow for me to go every week. But I go every other & try to get to other f2f meetings or come to MIP.


So, one day at a time, I will follow through on my plans to take care of me, my house & my beloved furbabies!!!!!


Thank you so much,


Debbie



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