The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Says he needs diskettes w/his resume, job hunting clothes, etc from Mom's house. Gave me his side of the story, asked what I knew. He had to setup an AfterCare program but did not need to stay with Salvation Army. I emailed him back. So with court involved how much do I need to stay out? I dont want either one in more trouble than they already are.
B4 recovery, i focused on everyone ELSE but me....so my problems did not change.....nothing changed becuz nothing changed...i was too busy trying to "fix them" to spend on addressing MY issues/ pain, etc.....so i staid in the same ole rut....
than i got tired of the pain and i came into recovery....i got a sponser....worked the steps....now i focus on ME and what i can do to heal me, so i CAN be a better sister/ friend, etc to my family.....not working their inventory, absorbing their problems, but loving them and helping, if i can, them find their OWN solutions.......AND knowing when to DETACH and "give them/ problem over to god"
i strongly suggest u get a sponser and get all the books u can on the 12 steps and work this program....one book i loved working was melodie beatties "12steps for codependents"...it was my "life 101" book...........this program only works if i work the 12steps and all the suggestions it offers......i make a list of the "things i CAN change" and i go over them w/ my sponser, than i apply the steps/ slogans/ literature and i PRACTICE what i am learning to help myself.....
I'm new here but not to 12 step programs. I hope I'm not stepping over boundaries if I share not knowing the circumstances. I was in the middle many a xs btween my A-mom and an A- bro. Caring about family can sure draw us into things that may turn out like they should without xtras involved. I used to want to control the outcome of my families troubles because I cared. In the long run I kept them from being more responsible for themselves by doing some of their part only to make myself feel better. And got myself into the game they were playing.
Not sure if this is food for thought , but take care of yourself.
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I tell myself when times are rough, "this to shall pass!!!" Ask HP for guidance, if the door is open, and I know how to look, I will become aware! I also visit http://www.inspiringthots.net/ . Blessings , Your sister in Recovery
