The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
When I was an alanon newbie, at times I thought some of the member responses were nearly callous in response to the shares on the board. One that came to me (over a year ago) really hurt my feelings and I thought something was wrong with that responder. So now I have almost two years in, and my sister in another state is the newbie. I sent her a reading from C2C-I think it was from March 25th-but it was stating our responsibilities and what things are not our responsibilities. It makes perfect sense to me. When I chair a F2F meeting in the near future, I think I will read it. But the reaction of my sister was one of, oh how sad. She is now in my seat and I have moved on. I guess to a newcomer that reading could sound cold. To me it's now my guide to live by. I got sick and tired of being sick and tired. And depressed, obsessed, resentful, trying to change another, let down, felt unloved, etc., etc., etc. I will remind my sister to take what she likes and leave the rest. She cannot yet let go of the idea that her A is going to change. I have learned that I do not even have to try and change her, someone I love with all my heart. I love this program. In a sense it has saved me from a life of continued misery. I am so grateful I can Let Go and Let God. I can't, He can, so I will let Him. Whew, what a relief! Lyne
I have found this too. Alanon gave me a new language and i was able to face things about myself, so i could say things like, i played the victim, martyr role. People in the program know that this is a common shortcoming but newbies think its an insult or a criticism. Reality can be a painful place in the beginning.x
Lyne, it has saved me from misery, too. I was able to make room for fun and enjoyment when I let go. My aim now is to live life on its terms.
I know what you're talking about. So good.
