Morning MIP-

This reading is about how our sense of responsibility can become inflated to the point that we are resentful for all that we do (even if we are the ones insisting on doing everything!).  I mentioned in an earlier post that my first experience with this feeling was as a child--I am the youngest of six children, and was babysitting for nieces, nephews and cousins by the time I was 10 years old.  At the same time I was proud that adults thought of me as mature enough to handle that, I also was resentful at times that as a child I was responsible for other children.  I have not had this experience at meetings, as described in the reading, but I definitely have taken on the responsibilities of others, been controlling, and then resentful over all of it.  

I am learning that not only am I helping myself when I allow others to do what they are perfectly able to do, but I am helping the people around me (my kids for example...learning to take care of loading the dishwasher or putting laundry in the dryer).   As some of you know, I am a music teacher and this philosophy is very much a part of the education world: delegating responsibility, making the classroom a student-driven environment.  All of these concepts are ones I am working on in my daily life as well.

I have noticed as I have gotten better about speaking up directly (saying what I mean, meaning what I say, but not saying it mean), an honest and direct question is most often met with an honest and direct answer.  I'm not as afraid for asking for help in general, and that feels a lot healthier to me than my life before Alanon.

For those of you that celebrate S. Patrick's Day...this Italian is wishing you a happy one!

Mary