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Post Info TOPIC: Firsts for him, first for me


Senior Member

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Posts: 239
Date:
Firsts for him, first for me


We had our first gaming convention this weekend.  At a hotel, with a bar.   Standard practice in the past was to bring his own scotch and get beer at the bar.   He had not had any cravings till Friday night.   Hubby had a craving for a drink after a stressful board game.  I WAS not there.  He does not have a sponsor yet...   and I can't push it.

 

he put thought into it and He CAME HOME instead of going to the bar!   Yay him.

 

 

first for me... I"m NOT checking up on him or ASKING him what he's up to or where he's going...

 

and today is VERY hard he's going up to see a friend of ours who  thankfully knows he's in recovery and won't push him but the guy makes his living dealing....

 

I am chomping at the bit to NOT text DAH  and ask  "how's it going"

 

it's a two hour trip so he should be home around dinner time and in time for a meeting.

 

I'm proud of him for saying NO to a drink in his brain (and I told him so)

 

meanwhile  HELP ME stay proud of me for NOT texting him and asking how's it going....  He's very good about checking in with me normally,



__________________

-- ladybug

We come to love not by finding a perfect person,
but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly.



~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 1896
Date:

Good job Nessa, my wife and I had some of the same kinds of struggles when she was released from rehab. Knowing her triggers, and valuing her sobriety, helped her thorugh some of those rough spots. So did a sponsor, I hope your husband can find one soon.

Not shoving bad things back in her face, and not being a grumpy gus all the time were my contributions.

It sounds like you are both doing well and respecting each others' side of the street.

Kenny

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Senior Member

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Posts: 239
Date:

Thanks Kenny... the feed back that we are doing it right helps. we were both so sick all last week I made no F2F meetings.



__________________

-- ladybug

We come to love not by finding a perfect person,
but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly.



~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 17196
Date:

Continued prayers Lady bug
Remembering that I am powerless over others helped me in the beginning . I could then focus on myself and quell my anxiety with the slogans or serenity prayer

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Betty

THE HIGHEST FORM OF WISDOM IS KINDNESS

Talmud


Senior Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 239
Date:

thanks Betty... a good reminder... I have slogans and tools that can help me!

__________________

-- ladybug

We come to love not by finding a perfect person,
but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly.



~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 1662
Date:

Good vibes your way!

You are doing Great ladybug!



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Senior Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 239
Date:

Thanks gang.. so I'm still at work and I get a one word text "home"

now I can relax.


thanks for reading the support here rocks.

__________________

-- ladybug

We come to love not by finding a perfect person,
but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly.



~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 5075
Date:

Keep working it lady.x

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~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 1095
Date:

Great work with this situation! And, it seems like it worked out well for both of you!

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Skorpi

If you are depressed, you are living in the past. If you are anxious, you are living in the future. If you are at peace, you are living in the present. - Lao Tzu



Senior Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 239
Date:

It did... sadly it tired him out too much for a meeting last night and he has guilt. He even had programed the location into his Nav he just fell asleep on the couch.

I did wake him and ask him if he wanted me to let him know the time and he said NO ... in the past I would have NAGGED him to get up and get to his meeting.

NOT my place. He has enough self-imposed guilt that he's not going.



__________________

-- ladybug

We come to love not by finding a perfect person,
but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly.

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