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Post Info TOPIC: too much stress!


Senior Member

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Posts: 419
Date:
too much stress!


Some of you know I have been having problems with my landlady,basically she is a slumlord and doesn't fix anything.She intimidates people with her anger and threatens you with eviction.The people who live here are afraid of her and they just keep quiet to have peace.I stood up to her about some things that needed fixed and she doesn't like that.Well I decided to avoid conflict,pay my rent and just tolerate the problems until I can move so I haven't had any contact with her.Well she has seriously crossed the line with me,she is crazy.Yesterday she stopped by my house,I was just coming home from school,I parked my car and she pulled up and got out of her car, and she said very hostile like,well I am here to check on the  serious mold problem.She said it very sarcastically!!I said don't worry about it,we have taken care of it.I was becoming upset  and things started getting pretty heated,my daughter was home sick with a virus and it is finals week for me so i was exhausted at the time and I told her today was not a good day to come in,i told her several times that  she was not to come in my house.As I could tell she was only wanting more drama.I decide to walk away from the situation, as I started up my porch steps she followed me,I unlocked my door and went in my house and proceeded to close my door she shoved on  the door with her shoulder and knocked me back into a chair!!!she proceeded to come  in my house, as I was saying you can't bust through my door like that.She became very hateful and walked back to my daughter's bathroom and took a picture and commented that there wasn't any visible mold,well no it has been three months and we did clean the visible mold.She had another woman with her and as she walked by my laundry room, there was some laundry on the floor by the washer and she told the girl to take a picture of it,like what she can use it against me.M y daughter and I were both in a state of shock and confusion and we didn't think to call police,I just couldn't believe she did this,I talked to my neighbor about it and he said he has heard of her doing things like this,she asked me for a move out date or she was going to evict me!!!!She has no grounds for eviction,my rent is always paid and I have proof.I can no longer handle this drama and I wish I could do something about her,I did call police the next day and I don't have many options.She is just using drama and intimidation to try and scare me,but it is so stressful, I am so tired and trying to do my finals and now I have to move to have peace!!!It isn't right!!!Today I am just sick with stress.



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Mary



Senior Member

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Posts: 419
Date:

I also did some online checking and a landlord can never enter your home without your permission, and a landlord can never forcefully enter your home ever,If this happens you can take them to small claims court.

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Mary



~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 1095
Date:

Hi Mary,
I am so sorry this happened!
I know I always have to give my tenants 24 hours notice before I enter the rental to fix or check on anything, unless they give me permission to come in sooner.
Is it possible for you to finish finals first, and worry about moving once they are done?
I hope the new place you find had more peace and calm for you! (((hugs)))

__________________

Skorpi

If you are depressed, you are living in the past. If you are anxious, you are living in the future. If you are at peace, you are living in the present. - Lao Tzu



Senior Member

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Posts: 419
Date:

Yes, I am focusing on my finals as much as possible and then spring break,Thank Goodness,so hopefully I will be able to find something.



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Mary



~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 3972
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She sounds horrible and I would have given her a piece of my mind in the driveway while dialing 911. Before al-anon I let so many people literally push past me on many issues and no longer. I know I am half way done with my semester and have midterms next week and it is stressful. Just remember priorities and the serenity prayer. I have had to write a list of things that are distracting and annoying me spinning around in my head and I cross off the ones I can do nothing about, which is most of them and I hand them over. Let go and Let God with them. I take care of the ones I can and get on with my day. Sending you love and support on your journey!

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Sending you love and support on your journey always! BreakingFree

Al-Anon/Alateen Family Group Headquarters, Inc. 800-344-2666

" Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional."

"Serenity is when your body and mind are in the same place."



~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 1887
Date:

Just reading this made me angry for you MJ. I've been treated like that in the past and it's so demoralising on top of the stress and injustice. I really hope that there is a place that you are going to find to move to that is just perfect and this is all happening to get you looking and willing to move; I really am certain now that is why I had such awful, awful luck and mistreatment by my former landlord and various accomodations/ housemates. I would never have imagined myself living where I am now yet, it's so good, I'm SO glad to have moved here. So maybe, just maybe that awful woman is playing a role in helping you towards a wonderful outcome that you can't see yet!! I hope so anyway.
It's frustrating when people get away with this kind of awful abuse of power but, I like to think I am winning when I refuse to allow bullies to get to me. As you say, she clearly wanted to upset you....so SHE is dependent on YOU for her bully-fix.
I really hope a new situation becomes available for you soon, she sounds ghastly.

__________________

If I had a world of my own, everything would be nonsense. Nothing would be what it is, because everything would be what it isn't. And contrary wise, what is, it wouldn't be. And what it wouldn't be, it would. You see? (Lewis Caroll)



Senior Member

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Posts: 419
Date:

Thank You guys I am praying that god helps me through this and helps me find a place where i can find joy and peace!!!

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Mary



~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 17196
Date:

Hi Mary, in my city, we have a tenant advocacy group that will represent any tenant that is being harassed as you are. Please check to see if your city or state offers such a protection.

I live in a rental apartment and it is clearly stated in the lease that the landlord is not permitted to enter the apartment without tenant approval.

Please try not to worry about this woman. I would make every effort, after classes are finished, to search for a new place of residence.

Prayers are powerful allies and I will offer mine for your intentions

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Betty

THE HIGHEST FORM OF WISDOM IS KINDNESS

Talmud


~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 5075
Date:

Its not a good situation at all, she has behaved badly, thats for sure but rmember who is in charge of your happiness, sere ity, peace. Not her, you. Now you know what shes all about, you cant chamge that. How you react and feel is entirly in your own hands. You can punish yourself by takjng a hurt, feeling like a victim or you can see it for the facts that it is, put it on a shelf and get on with your life, improving it, having a positive attitude regardless. Dont give this crazy woman your power. When you have got time look for another place to live if thats how you chokse to deal with it but i would not give her the power to effect my mental health, its a choice.

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Senior Member

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Posts: 419
Date:

I am definitely working on keeping my inner peace regardless how she acts,I am new at handling conflicts in a healthy way,I will have absolutely no further interaction with her,not answering phone or text messages.I still plan on moving as I have talked to my neighbors and everyone here seems quite miserable.I wish I wasn't such a nervous Nelly and be able to be the person who is able to make a change here,but too many people are afraid she will evict them to stand up to her,If I could take her to court and win believe me I would in this situation.

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Mary



Senior Member

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Posts: 419
Date:

I also believe I need some kind of advocate because she sent my daughter a text message saying she was going to evict me.

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Mary



~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 17196
Date:

Mary, Please check with the City or State agencies . I believe there should be one to address these abuses. In my City you do not even have to provide your name to register a complaint . Taking constructive action is important for your own self esteem



__________________
Betty

THE HIGHEST FORM OF WISDOM IS KINDNESS

Talmud


~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 1887
Date:

How old is your daughter Mary? That sounds really wrong and abusive.

__________________

If I had a world of my own, everything would be nonsense. Nothing would be what it is, because everything would be what it isn't. And contrary wise, what is, it wouldn't be. And what it wouldn't be, it would. You see? (Lewis Caroll)



Senior Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 419
Date:

My daughter is 17, and I am going to do something,I see my therapist on Thursday and she knows what I have been going through and she said she thought I had a case and should pursue it,and that was before all of this happened ,She mentioned a name and I am going to ask her about it, and I am going to pursue this,this is wrong.I have 2 sets of medical reports and since my daughter started sleeping in the living room she hasn't been sick.I am also going to have someone remove that sink and take pictures because I can see mold down under where you can't get to.

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Mary



Senior Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 419
Date:

I am done,I am done with being abused and bullied.I am done settling for a less than life.I am done with being threatened. I will have a beautiful life, and I will do this to maybe help the other people here a little bit.I am not afraid of her,I am strong and capable I am intelligent and I know this behavior is not okay!!!!!!

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Mary



~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 1095
Date:

Good for you, Mary! You are strong, capable and intelligent, and good for you for standing up to your bully landlord.

__________________

Skorpi

If you are depressed, you are living in the past. If you are anxious, you are living in the future. If you are at peace, you are living in the present. - Lao Tzu

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