The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
The ODA T reading for today is extremely powerful. It points out that many of us have lost our faith and belief in prayer, and that sometimes we reach a point where we cry out in anguish, begging an unknown power to relieve us of our burden.
The reading goes on to explain that we are imprisoned by our own inability or unwillingness to reach out for help to a power greater than ourselves as we have imprisoned ourselves by using our self will and pride.
Once we have let go, and finally ask for God's help, we must do so with absolute confidence and refuse to take back the problem into our own hands. Serenity prayer and meetings help us accomplish this
The quote is from the book of Common Prayer; "With the help of my God, I shall leap over the wall.
I know I had difficulty turning my will and life over to the care of HP, but once I reached that point of an absolute bottom and powerlessness. I surrendered and was pleasantly surprised by the power of my God.
Let go and let God is not just a quaint little saying it works
-- Edited by hotrod on Saturday 14th of March 2015 04:55:59 PM
I struggle with my faith often, but this struggle goes way back to my early 20's, when my first partner was diagnosed with cancer and was going through chemo. I had been considering going into the ministry for years, but at the time, it would have been against church policy. My faith community abandoned us both when I needed support the most, and I still feel the abandonment and pain of those old scars.
One thing I am learning is to be open to HP and prayer, and to find solace in prayer without a faith community. It is easy to do when I am alone, it is much more difficult to vocalize it and trust that I can have conversations that include references to prayer, faith, and HP with my Alanon family.
I definitely identify with being imprisoned by my inability to trust the HP, and I notice how much better I feel when I do reach out in prayer, and I kind of have to laugh at the inner struggle I go through to do so, because it is SO different from how I felt about prayer in my younger years!
__________________
Skorpi
If you are depressed, you are living in the past. If you are anxious, you are living in the future. If you are at peace, you are living in the present. - Lao Tzu
Taking it back. I am so terrible about this! I load up that back pack of hurts, regrets, disappointments, angers...I lay it down for my HP and in my dis-trust and self-centeredness, I pick that darned back pack back up and I'm back to square one! I want to be free of that heavy back pack for once and for all...
The quote is from the book of Common Prayer; "With the help of my God, I shall weep over the wall.
Interesting slip of the keyboard
I have been a lurker for a while and have really enjoyed the compassion and insights that have been shared on this forum.
Today's ODAT was of particular interest for me: I am an atheist/agnostic and was originally apprehensive about pursuing the 12 step program within Al Anon.
But I have been able to define my Higher Power as the Wisdom of the Program (of which this forum is a large part). I do the daily readings and have attended f2f meetings for several weeks now. I have definitely seen a significant improvement in my outlook and the way I am able to deal with my AW.
I just wanted to step out of the shadows for a bit to say a big thanks to all of you who have shared.
PS: No disrespect intended, Hotrod Betty. You are truly one of the shining lights of this forum.
I laugh because i have yet to put anything at Gods feet.
I like the option of going back to visit it again. There
Is so much i would like to unload forever and be done
With it But i can not make myself let it go yet.
I can forgive myself And others but not let go of my
problems. I trust God to take care of me so i guess
I really need to surrender myself over to the care of
God totally. That frightens me so i hold off. I hope i
Can do it when i feel safe and settled.
