The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I have to admit that I have been anonymously reading your conversations for a few months now and it has helped me feel more and more comfortable about jumping into this recovery program. I have read 'how al-anon works', Getting them Sober, and a few other books you all have recommended and those have helped too. I know when and where the face-to-face meeting (I plan to attend) is being held...I just haven't walked through the doors yet.
The alcoholic in my life is my husband (married 3 years, together 13) and we have a 10 month old son. Things were getting so bad that I almost packed up my very young baby and left around Thanksgiving, but instead I decided to try to learn more about what is happening in my life and in my home. Surely it's not normal for your spouse to be drunk every single day, and to drink vodka straight from a bottle hidden in the garage. How does anyone deal with the person they love while they watch them stumble, slur their words, say and do some really idiotic stuff and occasionally get verbally abusive and punch the walls. This was all escalating during a time I needed him most. We just had our first baby, and life was busy but supposed to be joyful. It got to the point that my days were ruined because of what happened the night before and my fear of the night to come.
After many times escaping to the bathroom at work, to get in my daily cry, I decided to look for answers and that's where I found this board. I can't say thank you enough for how much it has helped me. I have taken tips and drawn strength from stories that resonate with me... and even stories that don't seem that similar to my situation. Rationally I know that I will benefit even more by adding face-to-face meetings and I am ramping up to walk in that door soon.
but instead I decided to try to learn more about what is happening in my life and in my home..... This was all escalating during a time I needed him most...... supposed to be joyful.....my days were ruined...... and my fear.... many times...at work... daily cry, -
Many parts of your post "jumped out" at me..because I have felt it as many of us here have!
You are making choices for you and your child, please know he will feel what you feel and become what you become! this is not alanon necessarily but a FACT of childhood development.
My main wish for you is that you, take care of you for you and your baby. What ever that may look like for you in your life!!
You will find answers here.
-- Edited by glad on Thursday 5th of March 2015 04:33:30 PM
Welcome to Miracles in Progress, I'm so glad you came out of the shadows and are actively participating! It sounds like you have put your "lurktime" to good use in educating yourself about what is going on, you've listed some powerful books there. It sounds like you are all primed and ready for that first meeting, and to tackle the first step. That first step where you realize that life has become unmanageable. Taking the steps through the doors of that F2F meeting will start you on that long path of returning to sanity, it certainly has helped me to do that, and I'm[ sure it can for you too.
It sounds like your mind is already open, so be prepared to have it filled with all kinds of good insight and support at your meeting. And keep filling it here too, keep coming back, we all support each other no matter where we are in our journeys!
Glad you reached out. It can be a hard first step to take. It took me a long time to reach the point your at and admit i needed help. I hid all the gojngs on for lots of reasons. I hope you get the courage to keep reaching out because the face to face meetings is where i got what i needed along with the support hear on this forum. Keep coming back. It can be better for you and your family.
ive been in your place..actually even after 9mths of alanon under my belt, i still feel like a newcomer. actually im so grateful and wonder what i did without alanon. it has brought me peace and understanding and support
