The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
You will not need to do or say anything when you get to your meeting
Except to listen, learn and absorb. I did not speak for almost Two years,
I did a little bit but not much. You are there to help you whatever that
Takes. Go with an open mind.
Newbies like you it is good when they have begineers meetings they are
More open discussion type. We dont have one in our area. AA does we
Dont, it would be helpful but not enough people i guess.
There are more rules and regs at regular Meetings. "No cross talk is a
big one" Commenting on others shares, Like in a normal conversation.
You let people share their truths and make no comment. You talk about
Yourself and your journey. Your alcoholic is your qualifier thats all. This
Is about you healing from the effects of alcoholism. And your journey
To wellness. You learn the tools on how to deal wth the disease with
The use of boundaries and detachment with love.
They have three daily readers you can buy around 12-14 dollars each in
Us currency. They help explain the Alanon thinking. It takes quite awhile
To get the hang of it. Also finding a sponsor helps with your questions and
Growth.
Well, i canhelp with this one. When you go into the burgh hall, the meeting is at the back in a room with a shocking bright pink carpet. The chairs are all facing towards a small table where the person taking the meeting will sit. You will get a hug as soon as you go in and a cup of coffee. Then the meeting is opened with the preamble which is like a welcome. Members are then asked to read the steps and traditions and a reading from one of the books. Then the person at the table shares her own experience strength and hope. Then the members are invited to share. People who dont want to say much just say thanks i will just listen. No problem with that or people share whatever they got from the persons esh or something they want to say themselves. Then the meeting closes and everyone says the serenity prayer. It lasts about 1 to 2 hours. There is usually about 20 to 30 people there, all different ages and backgrounds. Its welcoming and feels good.x
You are not alone! Many have walked your path, keep going
Back for you! It is really all about you and your emotional
Health and your healing from the disease of alcoholism.
My dry ah and i had many fairly good years but the disease
Took away all the good there was. I wish i had started alanon
30 years ago for me and my marriage. My ah is still dry but
He is still an addict, with addict behaviors and thoughts.
Yes he does attend AA but that does not mean he is
Emotionally Healthy.
The disease does not go away on its own. It is an incurable
Disease, it can be arrested with abstinence only. Learn all
You can about the disease but your main concern should be
You. Stay out of your ah recovery and he should stay out of
Yours. It is a very personal journey.
He knew I was there today and only asked how I found it which I replied good thanks, he didn't ask anymore.
He's still being kind of off and I am still worried he will finish us but that's my problem and my issues which I hope al anon will help me get over Nd deal with. I suppose it never really does go away. But I believe what we have is special and therefore worth going down this path for. I have never addressed what I have been thro in the last particularly five or so years and feel now it's all getting on top of me hence feeling the way I do.
I've learnt to step back from the dysfunctional mother and sister but I don't want or need their negativity in my life, I just want my wee family to be ok and happy xx
I am good in some areas but not good in others. My main concern being the way partner is being now, still so distant, hasn't role me he loves me in almost two weeks even tho I have him, he's away at work so his msgs are very dry, abrupt and I am hurting, very anxious and it is making me not be me. X
Hang in there lola, keep trying to take care of you And your little ones. Keep going to meetings to Learn, listen and absorb. Keep the focus on you not Him. Let him focus on him!
Happiness is an inside job!
-- Edited by Mirandac on Sunday 15th of February 2015 01:34:29 AM
Thanks Miranda, I'm trying but I do get anxious. I've been told I haven't done anything wrong therefore I can't fix it but it's so hard when he and the kids, our life together is all I want xx
You will get the hang of it. You need to make yourself happy first and foremost. Then everyone else after that!
In dysfunctional families the dynamics Are Unheathy. We are not taught self Love and self care and self acceptance. When you get those down pat you are on the road to recovery.
Get some literatiure to read those daily readers are great. You can buy them after your alanon meeting.
-- Edited by Mirandac on Sunday 15th of February 2015 03:06:20 AM
I will get some literature for sure and I am reading as much as I can on here.
How do I know who my HP is? I do pray a lot to one just not sure who that is!
X
Most people its God, some people its alanon,mother earth Whatever your higher power is as long its not another Individual Such as a partner.
If you pray then put God first, then you. That is the natural order Of things but in dysfunction it is not. I was taught my thougts and Wants were not important. Just be good and stay out of the way.
Generally if we end up with dysfunctional or addicted people thats Were we come from too. Its that attraction of like minded people. We are comfortable around them because its what we know.
-- Edited by Mirandac on Sunday 15th of February 2015 04:08:00 AM
