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THE PAST MONTH HAS BEEN HELL FOR ME. AH DRINKING ALMOST KILLED HIM. THERE WERE HOSPITAL STAYS,JAIL STAYS FOR DOMESTIC,ETC BANK ACCOUNTS NEARLY EMPTY
THATS HIM
FOR ME PAIN,ANQUISH EXHAUSTION ANGRER RESOLVE, TRYING TO FIQUIRE OUT WHETER TO LEAVE, TO FIND A LIVING SITUATION LESS EXPENSIVE CLOSER TO RESOURCES AND MOSTLY..PAIN....
ALCOHOLISM IS THE WORST DEVIL.
SUPPOSEDLY HE IS ENTERING REHAB TODAY SO I WONT HAVE TO PUT THE 20 DAY RESTRAINING HOLD THAT LITERALLY TOOK ME 7 HRS IN COURTHOUSE TO GET. ALL FAMILY LAW HAS MOVED FAR AWAY AND I DONT DRIVE....MY MIND SEEMS EMPTY AND I AM GOING TO A FACE TO FACE MEETING TONITE WITH SPONSER
Alyce, with all the negative stuff happening here, I'm glad you are able to get to a meeting tonight. When I am these kinds of situations, it becomes important for me to not isolate myself, in me that can cause some bad depression. Get all the support you can from F2F meeting, and keep coming back here as well so we can give you ESH.
The story you presented is very, very similar to mine. The only difference is I was the one that ended up in jail rather than my AW. She told the police I choked her until she almost passed out. Funny part is, I'm the one with all the scratches on my face, bruises on my face, chest, arms, legs, and I'm the one that was sent to jail. With your husband being involved with domestic things, I'm surprised he's allowed to be around you. In my case, I'm not allowed contact with my AW until my hearing date; almost 2 months from now. We, too, have the hospital stays. Mainly from her withdraw symptoms, tremors, headaches, itchiness, cramping etc.
I share your pain and exhaustion. It's been a week since her and I have spoken or seen one another. It's either no contact, or I go to jail. With the weekend coming up, I sure am in a funk because the weekends were a time of sobriety for my AW. Times of sobriety in my house were absolute bliss that brought back memories of why I married her. This weekend is going to be a pretty big struggle. I know I'll get through it though.
My AW has also said she was entering outpatient treatment this week. Although she hasn't contacted me with her hateful text messages, she's been plaguing my parents phone. Those are big red flags she's been drinking again. My sober wife wouldn't do something like that in a million years. One thing I've learned is he has to do it for himself. Not because you want him to, or not so he won't have a 20 day restraining hold put on him, but for himself and himself ONLY.
I do encourage you to go to a face to face meeting. I went to one last Friday night, I'll be going again tomorrow night, and the results really opened my eyes to just how much pain I really am in. Embrace what you hear in this meeting and go in with a completely open mind. I'll bet you, too, will have a similar experience.
thanks for the support,ah is in rehab and is in that pink cloud of feeling he is cured... the statistics scare me 15 to 20 % stay sober permanently. I can also predict that he will do those make up manuvers and promises of going to meetings etc. We are in a deep financial situation,trying to keep our house and he has wiped out his bank account. thank god, i still have a few measly bucks.
I want to believe and be supportive of him but honestly i dont think he will make it. he also has a bad gambling addiction.i dont make enough money now to support myself and frnkly dont know what i will do from moment to moment. even my pension from the family business we both work in,needs his signature so i can get my little nest egg out
im taking it day by day. i go to at least 1 meeting face to face a week and try to attend as many meetings online as i can and also read the board daily