The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I came home from work early today with a bad headache. I am also feeling really depressed about everything thats going on with me. House will probably foreclose next month. Leaving a familiar area of work after a very long time. Starting a new job next month. Miss my older college kids a lot. Feeling lonely. Trying to look at the positives in my life. Sometimes I dont feel positive at all. Coworker high school type drama doesnt help either. AH is not being a communicative co parent. This also makes life more difficult for me...figuring out childcare, etc. ugh. Calgon take me away.
Please send postive vibes my way....thanks everyone for being here.
In a very short time, you will be leaving what has become a major drain on you with the house behind. You will be leaving co-workers that aren't right for you anymore behind. You will be starting a new job that will pay you more and is a shorter drive for you. Your older girls are taking good care of themselves by getting a college education that you have enabled and supported. You will find a sitter who will be more reliable without all the strings attached that comes with your AH. And your youngest daughter seems to be a real sweetheart that you are raising.
Those are the positive vibes I have to send you tonight. That and prayers for a relief from your headache and a restful and peaceful sleep.
-- Edited by grateful2be on Sunday 1st of February 2015 11:07:16 PM
Hey NLG!!! I've heard of others in the program using the Calgon method with success. Why not?? You still have the tub? with Higher Power...hmmm I mean hot water?
Remember you have choices, you could see all this as a positive. Your headache will pass, your house is finally getting sorted which will remove all the anxiety you have had over it. You had the guts to go for a new job and you got it, thats great news. Your children are dojng well. It seems to me that your post is full of very good things.
I agree with Elcee. It will take some work, but I do think your best bet is to change your thinking. I hear mostly positives. You have stated you are afraid of change and it seems that this is growing pains for you. So I am praying for your growth and that you don't have so much anxiety about these changes. Soon you will be in a new work place with new people to interact with, less drama, the house will be something behind you, the kids will continue to grow and prosper...your ex - well that is what alanon is for. You will detach more and more. Work hard to envision the positive and know how strong you already are.
Sometimes the way you down yourself makes me feel sad for you. Like "Ugh...I have two failed marriages" when the truth is more like "Wow, I had the strength and courage and respect for myself to dig deep and move on from 2 unhealthy relationships. Go me!!" You see what I mean?
Of course I am sending prayers....a prayer that you will continue to follow what is for your highest good, and you are doing just that based on your posts. You have done for yourself what many wish they could....stand there for a bit and see how it feels (((NLG))).
I still have the headache too Andromeda. I had to stay home from work today. I get migraines and my head will hurt for days.
thanks PC and everyone who pointed out my post sounded positive. I always have to work hard on seeing the positive things.
I think that things often don't look positive when one is in the middle of change. That's why it's best to keep the head down and think about where you are going, instead of where you are right now. Where you are right now is temporary, just part of the hard road, the destination is worth it.
My wife talked me into moving houses in 2014. This was a lot of work, and the lot of work was the real reason I didn't want to move, and hadn't wanted to for a feew years, even though it was definitely time to go. It was easy to get discouraged in the middle of all this. However, once we found the house we wanted, it wasn't so hard because we would keep saying "once this is over we will be in the house we want, instead of this place, which has outlived its usefulness".
