Packing will keep me busy over the holidays. - Al-Anon Family Group

Luiza · Senior Member

Packing will keep me busy over the holidays.

missmeliss · ~*Service Worker*~

I'm sorry, Luiza.
I hope, eventually, it will lead to a better living situation for you and be a blessing in disguise.
It's not nice having to move and not have a secure home when trying to deal with so many changes already.
Prayers for you and your girl.

Luiza · Senior Member

MissMelliss you came in my mind as soon as I got the news.
To be honest I wasn't surprised.I have always kept it clear in my mind that I am a tenant and this is not MY home and I could be asked to leave at any time. I always prepared myself for this day. In fact I was talking about it on Saturday.
I have always been a good tenant, rent paid on time, I look after the property well. But I can't do magic. I will do what I can but I can't do magic. I have work to go to, assignments to complete and a child to look after. Also I have very little income. I am not going to get stressed over it, I will do what I can.
I hope it is a blessing in disguise. I am calm (for now).

grateful2be · ~*Service Worker*~

Hope you find a place where you and your daughter can begin brand new memories that don't include the toxic energy that you will be able to leave totally behind you. Still love to look at this beautiful peacock. Seems to be a Christmas bird to me (and one that won't get eaten which will make our very own Debilyn very happy.)

Luiza · Senior Member

At least the A and his family won't need to resent me anymore for staying here and 'kicking' him out.
If this happened at the beginning of the year it would mean that we would be moving in together to a new place. NOT GOOD. So I am glad I am on my own. I think it is HP's timing. Tomorrow I need to start making phone calls and getting advice. And will start getting organised too.

hotrod · ~*Service Worker*~

Sorry to read this is happening at the Holiday time Prayers for a positive outcome

Newlife girl · ~*Service Worker*~

You sound so strong and calm about this. That's a good sign! I have a feeling this will be a good outcome for you. I hope you find a good place to move and I hope it's not stressful. It's hard to go through this.

Luiza · Senior Member

Yes it is hard. All the packing. Looking for places, moving out etc
Daughter heard the conversation with the LL so she is worried already. Luckily this is the last week of school.
I will put in an application for homelessness but from the info I am gathering online, I need to wait until the LL evicts me thorough the courts which would take a few moths (3 to 6 months). I would then be entitled to social temporary accommodation and then social permanent accommodation. I don't want to cause any hassle to the LL but I really can't see any other option. When I moved in here a little over 3 years ago the renting was already prohibitive expensive but there were two incomes and we managed. But now I am just about managing with one income and lots of help from the gov...to move to a new place paying 2015 rent price plus deposit plus moving expenses is just impossible.
I feel bad for the LL but I have to think about mine and daughter's needs too.

-- Edited by Luiza on Monday 15th of December 2014 06:17:39 PM

andromeda · ~*Service Worker*~

Ugh, I hate packing. I'm consolidating things and preparing things to pack, too, so I get it. Hugs to you! Can you get help from friends for moving so that you can avoid some of the costs? Moving can be quite expensive when it comes to renting and packing but there's also utility turn on and off charges, etc that have to be factored in. You are doing the best you can with the tools you have before you and your HP is with you every step of the way.

Debilyn · ~*Service Worker*~

Luiza, did you get it in writing? I invite you to go here online: Your state Landlord Tenant law.

Like mine is Oregon landlord tenant law. Will he give a good reference? If you are not worried about that. Legally he has to go to court to get you out. It can take as long as four months in Oregon.

JUST in case he is nasty, find out your rights. pm me if you need help. Not a good time to find housing.

Hope things go ok! hugs!

Luiza · Senior Member

I asked him to put it in writing. I need an eviction letter anyway to get help from the gov.
He needs to evict me through court if he wants me out. Unless I agree to move out voluntarily which I can not afford at all. I know it. I was looking for places not long ago when the A was adamant he wasn't going to move out.
Anyway I will make phone calls tomorrow. I need to call my Social Worker to find out the outcome of her meeting with the A and mention this new problem. I don't know if she can do anything to help.
Thnaks for the support like always.

Debilyn · ~*Service Worker*~

I hate to suggest this. But in order to move you may want to stop paying rent to save it to move. He can evict you no cause, or becuz of not paying rent.

If after about two court dates judge says you owe whatever. then he has to go to small claims to get it. THEN he has to hire someone to garnish your wages if you have any. Its very hard to get the money believe me. I was a landlord many years.

Again it depends on your state. You may want to asap get signed up for HUD.

Debilyn · ~*Service Worker*~

http://www.inbrief.co.uk/property-law/landlord-and-tenant-rights.htm

I just read to evict they have to give you 3 months! Has to be in writing and also has to have correct dates etc on it.

Again it said to check your states laws. do you have a housing authority?

I would think your social worker for housing should know how to direct you. hugs hon.

even if home is in his name. they still have to follow the legal procedure to get you out.

Luiza · Senior Member

Thanks Debilyn.

Problem is if I stop paying rent then he will have grounds to evict me and the housing authority will then say that I made myself homeless on purpose by not paying rent and will refuse to help.
If he just takes me through court because I refuse to vacate the property, then I will be classed as a homeless through not fault of my own and the housing authority will have to find me accommodation no matter what. The only problem with it is that I won't be able to chose the area or the place and it will probably be temporary at first and afterwards move again to a permanent accommodation but once I am at a permanent accommodation it will be for life (unless I am evicted for rent in arrears or anti-social behaviour) rent in the authority accommodation is a lot cheaper and I can be there forever. Even after I die, daughter can remain there herself.

It will be madness if I move out voluntarily to another private accommodation with a stranger for a LL and have this uncertainty of having to move out again when the LL decides to have their place back.

See. All the time when A was here telling me he wouldn't move out, I researched a lot about housing. This was the lesson HP had for me. I am glad I did my homework.

I am feeling really sorry and really awful that I will not be able to move out smoothly like the LL wants me to. But I just can't afford at the moment. And I need to do what is right for me.

And I think LL is lying to me anyway,I mean, he told me that yesterday (Sunday) his friend who lets his house to him gave him notice because the house is being sold and now he needs to move back in here with his wife and 2 kids...really? He wasn't even living here when it was only his wife and 1 kid! I think it is baloney. He is either in trouble with his mortgage company (perhaps he isn't allowed to rent the property out) or his relationship broke down and he needs to live somewhere.

Either way, I need to do what is right for me.

-- Edited by Luiza on Monday 15th of December 2014 08:08:54 PM

-- Edited by Luiza on Monday 15th of December 2014 08:11:13 PM

grateful2be · ~*Service Worker*~

I have learned that when something comes out of the blue ie what you describe here, its because my HP has bigger plans or better plans for me than I have for myself. I do have to do all the leg work that presents itself to me at the time which always shows itself to be a stepping stone to a higher place later on. I can fight the change or accept it and work with the cards that have been dealt to me at the time. I've done both. I sleep better when I trust I am being led and walk through the doors that open to me when a door closes on me. I get scared sometimes and it might take me some time to work those fears through by talking things over with my sponsor and/or a fellowship member, prayer or meditation but the way becomes clear for me if I ask for clarity and trust that what I need to know will come to me without any effort on my part.

I find your circumstance to be one of those out of the blue experiences that don't seem to have any rhyme or reason to it if you've paid your rent on time, have taken care of the property as agreed and have done nothing to violate the landlord's terms or trust. It will be interesting to see where your HP will guide you and how HP will do it.

Jerry F · ~*Service Worker*~

L...this is how I also learned hope and faith and patience. Keep your Higher Power in the mix as I know you do and continue on with what it is that you can do and for which you are responsible. Your spiritual condition sounds solid. I'll need to watch for examples. (((((hugs))))) smile

Luiza · Senior Member

I know it is early days and I have a lot more research to do and professional advice to get but I am confused by my own thinking and behaviour. Am I accepting the changes or resisting it? Or both? I took it really well...I kind of knew it was coming somehow BUT I won't go on his terms either. I will not break the law but there are few rules here. The LL can't evict me. Only the courts can evict me. Yes he can give me a formal notice and ask me to leave within a time frame but I don't have to accept it if it doesn't suit me. So technically I am doing nothing wrong by not moving when he wants me too.

-- Edited by Luiza on Tuesday 16th of December 2014 05:30:56 PM

PP · ~*Service Worker*~

Luiza, do what is best for you and your daughter and stay in your integrity. Honor your agreements and, to the best of your ability, hold your landlord accountable in honoring his. Listen closely to your HP through contemplative, reflective time, then take the next best action. You were wise in doing your research ahead of time and you will proceed wisely, of that I am sure. Hugs and hope for the best outcomes.

cloudyskies · ~*Service Worker*~

Luiza, I'm sorry this is happening. Trusting in your HP will bring you peace. Please know that I am praying for you.

grateful2be · ~*Service Worker*~

It's not impossible to resist and to accept at the same time. It is part of the human condition to say no to the unknown (resistance) and yes to facts that are being presented to us that indicate change. I think that the Serenity Prayer is a big help in determining what we can change and what we can't change and Step 4 helps us ferret out our motives as we make necessary decisions and follow through on them.

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