What does a sponsor do? - Al-Anon Family Group

frustrationshigh · Member

What does a sponsor do?

grateful2be · ~*Service Worker*~

I can only speak according to my own experience as an Al-Anon member. My sponsors (both at different times in my progressive recovery) have helped me work the steps and learn to live according to Al-Anon principles. They have also been my go to person for sharing details that are better left unsaid in my groups and best said to my sponsor. Both have demonstrated that they do what they suggest. They go to meetings, have sponsors themselves, read literature and work their program daily.

-- Edited by grateful2be on Thursday 11th of December 2014 12:27:03 PM

hotrod · ~*Service Worker*~

Rough outline of what a sponsor is like in AA AND HOLDS TRUE FOR ALANON AS WELL

This is an individual who will usually have more experience in the program than the sponsee. This means that they will be able to share their wisdom and experience.
* Most sponsors will tell their sponsee to contact them at any time of the day or night if it is an emergency. The urge to relapse can come at any time, and having somebody to contact can make all the difference.
* A sponsor can just be a good friend. One of the things that people worry about when they first enter recovery is that they will never be able to form meaningful relationships without their chemical crutch. What they learn is that friendships in sobriety can be stronger than anything they have ever experienced previously. One of their most important relationships may be with their sponsor.
* This is an individual who will offer encouragement and provide praise for achievements.
* A sponsor should be able to provide honest feedback.
* A more experienced person in recovery will be able to spot the warning signs of an approaching relapse. They may be able to guide the sponsee back to safety.
* This is someone who can be a good role model for their sponsee
* It is often the job of the sponsor to help the sponsee work their way through the 12 steps

cloudyskies · ~*Service Worker*~

I have two sponsors. They have both been Al-Anoners for many years. In addition to what HR and Grateful said, both my sponsors are great listeners. They listen to me without being judgmental and without offering advice. They ask me questions that somehow lead me to the answers I need. A good sponsor helps you get through the tough times and celebrates with you the good times.

it works if you work it.

Debilyn · ~*Service Worker*~

Betty has it perfectly. It's important a sponsor be there for the person, be real and not baby them. But also be careful how they present things.

Guiding thru the steps is important. Listening and answering questions. A lot is listening, if one wants feed back ask for it.

can be online too.

This message board is a pot of gold for being a group sponsor for each other.

We do have more seasoned people here that may step in to help someone in their responses too.

Great question!

I don't know if anyone has mentioned boundaries with you? Sounds like you may want to think of some with A with consequences. I would surely make some if A acts like that in front of kiddos. Kids NEED to feel safe and loved. They are NUMBER ONE.

I know you must feel that way. We have no idea if she drinks and drives?

The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.