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I am upset today!My ex called my teenage daughter last night,it was late and she didn't realize it was him calling.I was in bed when she came and told me.I changed my phone number but I wasn't even thinking about her phone at the time,I have had so much on my plate.It really makes me angry that he had the nerve to call her and he asked her if she needed money!Really, manipulate a child now!Oh how I would love to send a message back to him stating how I feel,but that is probably why he did it in the first place to get a response from me. I am thinking about talking to her about changing her number,I think it would be best,of course it is her phone and it is up to her,but I don't think he should be calling her.I know what I want to do but what I need to do is just let it go.what do you guys think?
Does your x and your daughter have a special relationship? How old is your daughter? Forgive the questions if they feel invasive. I simply don't have enough information to respond to you on this one and don't need it if these are questions you don't want to answer.
She is 17,and she doesn't like the way he has treated me.I don't think she likes him.I wouldn't call it a good relationship,because of all the lies,and when he has let us down.
Well, at 17 and given the reality that he's not her Dad, I agree that this is something she gets to decide with your guidance. Considering that she told you about it, maybe she's not sure how to handle it? Being a teen with her phone being her lifeline - do you think she would be willing to change her phone number or can she just block his calls on it so that no calls can come through to her? As a Mom, I would be concerned if my x was calling my daughter and I would be concerned that he might show up wherever he knows she might be. I'd probably talk with her about that, too, with ideas on how to handle herself should he show up somewhere just so she has ideas on what to do to take care of herself. As are so unpredictable when they're using and boundary crashes on top of it. I would be as concerned as you are right now.
Yes,I definitely will talk with her about it,as right now he is really sick,it is more substances than alcohol if you know what I mean and I don't want anymore to do with him,or my daughter.She is pretty level headed and sometimes I think she is more mature than I am.She has stated that she doesn't want any help from him.
I think I will just have her only answer numbers she recognizes,she shouldn't have to change her number because of him.He usually calls from numbers that say no name so she can watch for that.
If she wants no contact with him and he continues to contact her through text, calls and other people, it might be helpful to call the police to ask for their advice? If you want no contact with him and have asked him to stop contacting you and your daughter (and neither of you are contacting him), calling the police for their help for both you and your minor daughter might be an option that interests you.
-- Edited by grateful2be on Monday 8th of December 2014 02:00:55 PM
I did talk to her about it and she said he has a new phone,otherwise she wouldn't have answered if she knew it was him,I don't have to worry about her answering it again,believe me,she is as tired of him as I am.She just won't answer any more calls.If there are more problems I will take them as they come.I think with him the less attention the better.
You sound like a wonderful and caring mother. She is a lucky girl and sounds like she has her head screwed on right. Hopefully this drama stops for you soon xx
mj...call the child and family services people in your area and tell them what has gone on and ask them if they will help you get a TRO...Temporary Restraining Order which if you can get it will keep him out of your spaces up to 500 feet and no phone contact until there is resolution. My suggestion comes from experience working the field...This also works when you work it. ((((hugs))))
mj...call the child and family services people in your area and tell them what has gone on and ask them if they will help you get a TRO...Temporary Restraining Order which if you can get it will keep him out of your spaces up to 500 feet and no phone contact until there is resolution. My suggestion comes from experience working the field...This also works when you work it. ((((hugs))))
I second what Jerry says here.....she is a minor, this is manipulation and invasive on his part......sometimes one needs to use FORCE to defend their boundaries.....a RO is the best thing.....I was reading your post, from top to bottom, and i thought the same thing Jerry did here.......call the cops main office and ask them what steps you need to do to execute the RO...meantime??? NO calls answered unless daughter is SURE she knows who it is.....your X is trying to mess with your head and daughter's as well.....he needs to be gone and out of your lives so you can move on from this......
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