Filing for bankruptcy and need ESH - Al-Anon Family Group

Breakingfree · ~*Service Worker*~

Filing for bankruptcy and need ESH

Jerry F · ~*Service Worker*~

That is only one of the consequences which might be caused by the disease. If you have made an error go back and correct and in financial errors sometimes that takes a bk. You'll live thru it and so will the creditors. You didn't intend it to happen and it did anyways. I ran my financial, thoughts, feelings, behaviors and intentions thru the 4th and now also the 10th and so far I've been doing much better than before. ((((hugs)))) wink

Do threat them though fairly, honestly and with justice.

neshema2 · ~*Service Worker*~

Hey BF....#s 7 and 13 are for individuals....a #7, they CAN (trustee who discharges the debts, pays secured debts, etc) liquidate some assets and use proceeds to pay off debt.....a #13 would probably be better, maybe b/c if you go into arrears on debt re: mortgage/car payment, you usually can slide a bit.......

most unsecured debt is either paid off in a small amount or wiped...now IRS is gonna get theirs no matter what, some creditors do not get written off....state taxes, prop. taxes.... some debt u have to pay and they will usually work out a payment plan.........if you were a business and had employees, they would be a secured creditor...but in your case with your average payables, non secured stuff can get wiped....it takes several months about to get it all done, depending on paper work volume ...U R good to see an atty...they will look at your picture and decide if you are best w/a #7 or #13.....it all depends on what you have, what you owe, etc.....

as to your credit rating, yea, it will take a hit, but ya know , a lot of companies will issue credit to one in BK b/c they are 'cleaned up" so to speak...so its not the end of the world...sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do....the alcoholic disease has a monstrous affect on finances, too and sometimes we have to make drastic steps.....a BK isn't the big black mark on a person like it used to be...in this new age of more and more new poor since the crash, BK's are becoming more common....I think it is the responsible thing to do....sometimes there isn't any way out and between interest charges and penalties, sounds like you might be making the best choice......sorry this had to happen, but it doesn't stay on your credit report 4ever........sounds to me prudent if you are that much in debt...taking care of you/kids first..........good luck meeting w/lawyer.......

PP · ~*Service Worker*~

BF, three years ago we had to make this heart wrenching decision. It was heart wrenching because we are people that do not live with frivolity or spend money carelessly. The economy was such that we had to cut our losses and regroup. We filed chapter 13, which means we are paying back what we can with our income. I had someone ask me a question that helped...he said, " if your foot had gangrene, would you cut it off to save your life?" The debt we had due to rental properties, poor business decisions and destructive tenants was killing us. We worked through lots of shame. We got 3 consults before we chose an attorney to handle the process. You are wise to obtain these consults so you have the info you need to make the best decision.

Debilyn · ~*Service Worker*~

I believe it is 11 where you don't pay things back. That is the way to go in my experience. Most states it is off your record in 7-10 years.

The way the world is we an get into a financial mess easy. they bug and bug us to use credit then freak when we cannot pay for amonth.

fees can be waived or used to, for low income,certain circumstances. some people do their own like you can do your own divorce.

It will leave you so very relieved. start over learn from it. I never use cr cards, have a walmart debit card. will not use banks as they rip you off make mistakes and can ruin you. Like accidently take out money from your account, oh so sorry but we cannot put it back for 30 days. stupid.

My life is so much mellower living like this. Some places charge more if you pay with cash!!!

I hope you do it. the relief will make your life better. Not your fault A got so sick and left you with all the bills.

hugs, one day at a time.

andromeda · ~*Service Worker*~

I'm sorry, BF, I know this can be stressful. My sister just filed last year because her slacker husband hadn't worked for a year before he left her for another woman across the country. My aunt also filed a chapter 11 three years ago. I know quite a few people who are getting credit faster than they expected after filing for bankruptcy. You always think through your decisions thoroughly so I guess my ESH is just to trust your HP and turn it all over to Him. God bless you, you're a great mom and I know you will be back on your feet in no time! HUGS!!!

Newlife girl · ~*Service Worker*~

I understand. I am probably losing my home to foreclosure. I don't believe in beating myself up over decisions I have made in life. Al Anon has helped me be positive and trust in my HP. Things will work out for you. Sounds like you are educating yourself about it and that's good. I might have to file too some day.

glad · ~*Service Worker*~

I don't know all the details but a family member of mine just stopped paying her bills. They were called "charge offs" and went off her credit in 3 years and she rebuilt her credit just as if she were starting over clean. Bankruptcy in some cases really hangs on.

Bankruptcy can ruin your credit for 7 years or much longer depending on what happens. It depends a lot on what judge you get, some Judges don't like Bankruptcy and will not accept your filing. Some will. Also remember the attorney you met with makes money off your troubles and it is in his best interest to tell you bankruptcy is going to solve all your problems...

If it works for you I would consider paying house, car things you can loose. And just let your unsecured debtors know you can't pay or will only pay a very little bit. You'll have to cope with some collection calls for a bit but maybe not ruin your credit for as long..

May not be correct just from observation.

pinkchip · ~*Service Worker*~

My husband filed a couple years before we met....5 or 6 years later, his credit score is in the 700s...It all also had to do with rental properties tanking...

Jackie11 · ~*Service Worker*~

You have received wonderful ESH! At one point I considered filing because of the way the economy had tanked and how high my debt was. I like the ESH about the gangrene, you would cut off a limb that was hurting you, and this seems similar.

Sending you love and support!

Turris · Member

Hi Breakingfree,

I'm not from the States so my knowledge over this matter would likely not be applicable to your situation, so I can't be of much use there.

However shame is a familiar feeling and I still feel it even after having worked the program for three years. I think its very mature that despite the shame you acknowledge the problem and so fantastic that you are trying to find a reasonable way to deal with it. A lot of my anxiety and stress is usually caused by my sheer inability to act on a pressing problem, even though I know I'll feel better taking steps to correct it. Thumbs up for you for taking matters into your own hands! And of course we are here for you if you need us! smile

Breakingfree · ~*Service Worker*~

Thanks all, I have to actually let my credit cards default before I can file and after meeting the attorney who wants $1000 before he will do anything for me I am going to shop around. He told me the differences in filing and how to keep my car that I need for school. Wow, if I knew this I would have done this years ago. Thanks fro the wonderful ESH!

SerenityRUS · ~*Service Worker*~

Hugs BF, .. do what you need to do to get some good footing. I think you will be fine. 1000 sounds pretty good to file bankruptcy make sure there are no hidden fees .. atty's like to hide fees like that .. big hugs again .. P :)

PP · ~*Service Worker*~

BF, I think it is wise to shop around. All of our attorney fees were rolled into the bankruptcy planned, so he was paid through the plan.

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