The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I haven't posted in a while,I came down with a bad head cold so I kind of just shut down and gave myself permission to deal with my cold and not stress about emotions or recovery.I received a phone call from my ex, it had been a while since I talked to him, well, I answered the phone and it was pretty much the same crap,lots of drama, I have heard for years.He was crying and trying to get me to feel sorry for him,still blaming, and as I suspected he wanted me to take him back.Basically he is in a nursing home,for complications from a knee replacement surgery,well, I believe from his unhealthy lifestyle, and he doesn't have a place to go when he is released,which is his fault,his family won't even take him in.I handled the call really well,I didn't get sucked into the drama,I didn't argue,I didn't try to tell him what to do,I was honest and mostly just listened, but I am convinced that nothing short of a miracle would change him,while we were on the phone a nurse came in his room to ask him if he needed anything and he said,''yeah, a budweiser''!!!
Good for you. It is true, they do what they have always done. For me I did better when I knew better, then I couldn't do the same things anymore without feeling crappy, because I knew better!
((mjferg)) It's not easy, but when things like that happened with my ex, I was reminded and reaffirmed that I had made effective boundaries and healthy choices for me. Keep the focus on yourself, as you are doing.
. It is true, they do what they have always done. For me I did better when I knew better, then I couldn't do the same things anymore without feeling crappy, because I knew better!