Inventory - Al-Anon Family Group

lookingup · ~*Service Worker*~

Inventory

PP · ~*Service Worker*~

I recommend getting a sponsor before you begin working your inventory, which is step 4.

KennyFenderjazz · ~*Service Worker*~

HI LU, I agree with Paula, best to get a sponsor and work through that question. You've been working Step 1 pretty hard, keep it up, you will get there! It is a process, you won't lose any feeling overnight, but only if you work through it by working the steps.

Kenny

grateful2be · ~*Service Worker*~

Often, outside counsel can be to stick up for ourselves as in "stick up for your rights." Trouble is, I didn't always know what my rights were and ended up fighting with a disease over which I was powerless. I don't think in terms of sticking up for myself. I do think in terms of taking care of myself by working the program daily, letting go of other people over which I am powerless, and doing things I love to do for me because I love to do them. That continual effort over time resulted in my knowing myself well enough to know that I don't need to be loved by another as much as I need to recognize that I am loved by a power greater than myself to whom I can turn for all that I need to exist, grow and thrive. No human being can be that for me and I don't have to stand up for myself in relationship to my HP. I can just be myself and that is enough.

Debilyn · ~*Service Worker*~

My inventory is stuff that is no ones business but my own.

No one has the right to judge me for having nine dogs, or driving a pick up or being a Jehovah's Witness that is MY stuff.

If I want to eat ice cream and then get so sick I end up in the hospital on IV's that is my business. no one has the righ to say hey stop eating ice cream.

No one has the right to tell me to buy new cloths and stop wearing overalls or whatever.

His inventor as an A is his life his his inventory,what he puts in his mouth where he lives, if he wants to cheat, or lie or steal is all his stuff. Not our right to boss them or tell them what to do.

If we choose to live with them, they get to be who they are. if we don't like it and cannot live with it we do not have to.

hope this makes sense, their stuff is theirs period. Just cuz we love or live with someone does not give us the right to judge them, police them or say you should...hugs

1911A1 · Senior Member

Along with what has already been shared in the previous posts, there is a piece of CAL specifically for the purpose of a Step 4 inventory; it's called "Blueprint for Progress." I have to reiterate what's already been said, though: a 4th Step inventory is most effective with the guidance of a sponsor.

Temple · ~*Service Worker*~

Thank you for the thread, LU.

And thank you, Debilyn. That is so much what I don't want to believe and just what I need to hear today and get by heart.

It is so crystal clear to you. How'd you get like that? Were you born that way?

I was just thinking as I walked in here: How Dare he not be the way I want him to be.

I had missed this thread. Bumping it up to the top. I know that wasn't what LU was asking. Just one of the little miracles of cross-talk. Of which I am a fan in the proper context. Which to me is on here. I think it's great that it isn't allowed in meetings and I hope Tulsa gets the message someday. Grins.

Love to everybody,
Temple

el-cee · ~*Service Worker*~

Looking up, easy does it. All the answers and changes your looking for takes a bit of time, not long in the grand scheme of things. I mean how long have you been sick or insane? For me, I was insane for years and it only took me a matter of a few meetings for the sanity to creep in. Its not 100 percent yet, still a bit crazy but much better.
The inventory is part of step 4 but theres no rush to get to them, well in my opinion. There are other easy little tasks to set yourself first just to get started. The leaflet on detahcment with love was brilliant, is read and read that. Pick a task from the just for today card and try hard each day with that. Read a daily reading if you have the books, if not they are online somewhere. If your really keen to look at your shortcomings and strengths then search for the blueprint for progress. Ive got a sheet of paper called this which I use and its quite interesting.

The inventory is in no way about anyone judging you, noone. Its about getting to know and accept yourself, come out of denial and see the whole you, not the fantasy that most of us have, the whole im good, honest, well behaved, mature while the alcoholic is bad, immature etc. Its about seeing the truth, that im all the things the alcoholic is too. We have similar shortcomings and its time to get off the high horse. Its a good good thing to do in my experience. The more we know about ourselves the better life gets.x

The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.