The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I was reading in Courage to Change, page 117, and wanted to share.
The most important words many of us hear when we first come to Al-Anon are, "Take what you like and leave the rest." Everything about our program is suggested, not required. This gives us the freedom to pick and choose. If we disagree with something, we don't have to use it. If we are not ready to use a Step, slogan, or tool, we are free to wait.
Many of us need time to come to terms with the spiritual nature of the Al-Anon program. If we were required to believe in a Higher Power in order to participate in Al-Anon, we might never have continued to attend meetings. Eventually, many of us do come to believe in a Higher Power because we are free to come to our own understanding in our own time. That way, whatever we learn will have meaning for us.
When we take what we like and leave the rest, we give ourselves permission to challenge new ideas, to make decisions for ourselves, and to even change our minds.
Today's Reminder
Because I am able to use whatever I find helpful and leave the rest, I can benefit from the experience, strength, and hope of others and still follow my own heart.
"With the help of this program and my Higher Power, I take charge of fashioning, shaping, choosing what kind of life I will have."
...In All Our Affairs
-- Edited by cloudyskies on Tuesday 12th of August 2014 10:27:50 PM
__________________
Look for the rainbow after the storm, and I'm sending you a double dose of HOPE. H-hold O-on P-pain E-ends
Linda I too appreciate this principle. For me, leaving the rest--means just that Leave the idea alone. Do not attempt to justify my inability to use it by finding fault , changing it, arguing the validity of the idea or challenging others who believe it . Simply move on and take another tool and use it.
This I came to understand was the "Grace" and "Mercy" nature of our program. Al-Anon knew how broken up I was and how resistant to force which might seem to be additional abuse tactics which what partly what I felt when I first arrived. I wouldn't put up with anything which seemed to being crammed down my throat and I was very very oppositional defiant that taproot of which is fear...for me. I loved the grace of it...when I continued to take what I liked the nature of the program became progressive successes because I was taking what worked for and in others which would work for me also when I let go of what wasn't. Leaving the rest mean't that I could rely on a treasure chest of many other practices and solutions which would be waiting for me when I had the need for them. Our program is a simple program for complicated people and for me that is how it worked best and still does. Great post. (((hugs)))
Thats a nice one, for me its saying keep an open mind, go easy, dont force it but do the work, it wont happen without it. Easy does it but do it everyday kind of thing.x
I also like this phrase very much indeed. It reminds me that we are all different, that someone else's view does not have to be my own but that it might, none the less, include something that is of value to me. I don't have to rebel or change it, I can leave it be. I like Hotrod's interpretation as well, the acceptance that there are elements that might not be for me to choose at this point in time, especially coupled with Jerry's idea that these things will still be there for me to adopt later if I would like to. Thank you for these thoughts Cloudy Skies.
Thank you all for the responses. To me, this principle means use what is comfortable to you at this time, whether it be a Step, slogan, advice, opinion etc., what ever helps you move forward. Our lives are and have been so tangled and twisted by alcoholism, and it is impossible to unravel this mess all at once. So we begin piece by piece. Maybe this slogan will help me remove this tangle and maybe this piece of advice will help me remove this twist. If we try to force these tangles and twist out, they only become tighter, but through our HP and Al-Anon, we can slowly and gently began to remove them. So I simply take what I need at the moment and leave the rest.
-- Edited by cloudyskies on Wednesday 13th of August 2014 04:39:17 PM
__________________
Look for the rainbow after the storm, and I'm sending you a double dose of HOPE. H-hold O-on P-pain E-ends
. Thank you for this post.