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So my girls went up north by their dad for 9 days and in that time he drank twice. Hmmm! The second night they were there he sent my 6 year old to his parents house (Mr king and queen enablers!) so he could go out and drink. My 16 year old was terribly uncomfortable then the next Friday night my 16 year old was headed out with her best friend to a musical and my exAH comes in with beer, she confronted him about this to which he says he is not going to drink. She left and came back to check on her 6 year old sister an hour later and he is downing the beers to which he says the kids are safe and all is fine. She went back out with her friends and then came home early to watch over her sister. It took her awhile after getting home to tell me how disappointed she is with him and how she doesn't want to go back up by him for awhile. She drives and we let her decide when and how long she will see him and well he just blew it. He is lost full blown when he can't even white knuckle it for a visit and well now the kids will stay by me without any visits and if he wants to fight me in court I am prepared, but doubt he has that kind of investment in his kids at this point. I should not be surprised, but yes I was caught a bit off guard, because he has pulled it off for the last few years that we know of. Yes, this disease is progressive and yes it only gets worse, I am glad I got out of the way and now will keep my kids out of his way also! not much of a difference for me, just disappointed for my kids.
On the other hand after being divorced 3 years and on my own for over 4 years, I met a great man that fully embraces my kids and I his and things are going very well. I am glad to have him in our lives as a healthy male role model! School starts in a month and my new job is going very well also! Sending everyone love and support on your journey's!
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Sending you love and support on your journey always! BreakingFree
Al-Anon/Alateen Family Group Headquarters, Inc. 800-344-2666
" Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional."
"Serenity is when your body and mind are in the same place."
Dear BF, I am saddened to read of the unfortunate incident that happened with your children this weekend. Your teenage daughter responded well in protecting her sister and your decision to allow the children to stay with you is a positive one. I am so pleased that your recovery has progressed so far, that you have found a relationship that is supportive and that your job and school are going so well. Thanks for the update and please keep coming back.
Glad that both the girls got home safely. I can't imagine what it is like to have a drugged or drunk parent. Sending all of you lots of prayers and support to include prayers for their Dad, too.
I am sorry for all of you, BF, especially your daughters. You have raised a wonderfully caring young woman with good instincts. I am happy for you in your current relationship.
Hugs BF .. you know where I stand on the issue of these kinds of unfortunate events. It sure makes things more difficult than they need to be .. frustrating.
Sending love and support, hugs S :)
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Faith minus vulnerability and mystery equals extremism. If you've got all the answers, then don't call what you do "faith". - Brene Brown
"Whatever truth you own doesn't own you" - Gary John Bishop
Im sorry bf, your eldest daughter sounds like a smart girl and at least you have more facts in which to base your future decisions. You have done so well, studying hard and a single parent, you should be very proud of yourself and your hard work is paying off. Dont let this dent your confidence or upset your happiness and serenity. I love reading about your new relationship, it feels like success and hope and real recovery. Your girls just know a little more about the disease and how their father is affected, at least their mum is sane.x
At least more sane than I used to be el-cee, haha. Thanks for the support! I always question myself as to am I being to hard with the exAh, but after 15 years of not having any boundaries and a people pleasing doormat taking too much crap I rather be this way now. Sending you all love and support!
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Sending you love and support on your journey always! BreakingFree
Al-Anon/Alateen Family Group Headquarters, Inc. 800-344-2666
" Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional."
"Serenity is when your body and mind are in the same place."
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