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I know I'mousting a lot but I have questions my abf asked to borrow my car and I said yes,he got me off gaurd I had said no this morning that I had no gas his car is on empty,he said he would be right back again I feel like he can talk me into about anything he is still gone said he would be right back it's been over an hour I told him he had better be right back and to put gas in my car he said over and over that yes he would be right back that he would take my Yorkshire with him to show me he would be right back,why does it have to be this way?thanks for letting me ramble on
LU, only you can answer that question for yourself. You're the only one who knows what is most important to you right now. Whatever you have chosen to do can be a help to you in some way.
What happens to you if he has an accident in your car and has been drinking? That is a huge bone of contention between my husband and I. Because his drinking and driving could be disaster for both of us, not just him. Your abf will say and do anything to get his next fix - that is his nature. But is is your choice that you let him talk you into things.
Looking up This is a very painful situation that you find yourself in I understand and do know that I had to set very firm boundaries with my son if I ever intended to survive his alcoholism. Lending money, cars, etc were definitely issues I said no to immediately and he realized early on not to ask. I did pay bills on occasion but never gave money directly to him The car was another" no no " My credit, my name on the car I HAD to refuse to be ruined by his actions I knew he had a disease and would say anything to get what he wanted or needed. I had to learn to say NO and mean it No matter what he said or did NO was NO. If he wanted the car today for a few minute I would have offered to drive him to his location not give him the keys Both are not choices what I should have done but what I learned I could do and not go insane.
Please know that you are responsible for yourself, your credit, your livelihood, and no one is going to come along and protect you unless you do it yourself, HP will give you the inspiration and the courage We must act upon the guidance.
Progress not perfection Keep sharing
You asked "Why does it have to be this way?" - it doesn't. All we have to do to get different results is to make different choices. You have the power. Take good care of yourself.
You go Looking...choose how you want it to come out and then make the decision to have it that way and then...practice, practice, practice. We never got it on the first go around; it takes/took practice. We've had years doing it the other way and we don't change overnight. Love this post cause for me it is a learning post. Mahalo (((((hugs)))))
