Went to a celebration of someone's first year of sobriety over the weekend.  It was the son of a couple in AA. The dad and mom were hosting the party for the son in the family home. We'd been to their house for a holiday party last year. The family has a very beautiful home and as we were getting closer to the house I was growing irritable.  We'd parked far from the house because there were so many guests attending the party.  I identified my irritability as a momentary feeling envy with feelings of personal failure concerning life's "material" accomplishments. Of course feelings aren't facts and upon entering their home I was overtaken by the welcoming atmosphere, hope and reality. The reality that good things can happen with footwork and a loving hp.  We thanked our hosts for the invitation and visited with the son and offered words of encouragement - odaat etc.  There was the usual evasiveness between guests meeting for the first time as to how they knew the hosts. His wife was in "a group" with the husband's wife or he was in "a group" with the husband. Then the response from bf that he is in a group with husband and me saying I am in a group with families at the same time that bf is in the other group and we all laugh at the obvious - we know our anonymity is safe. 

So outside the first year sober son's father and I talked a bit about Alanon and he confided how helpful the program had been to him and his wife both in AA while his son was using. He said particularly learning about "detachment."  He expressed the same zeal of any hopefully parent telling me about the service work his boy has been doing and particularly with teens.  He expressed that it gave him hope that his son really will keep what he has, that and getting to know so many in recovery at gatherings like this of sober people who want to keep sober.  The dad and mom have been in the program a long time and although you can't ever know what goes on within another person, to outward appearances they seem to be pretty serene. I watched as dad seemed to make sure he visited with all of the many guests at some point and mom kept the food coming and chatted with visitors to kitchen.  Just like "normal" folks.  Lots of people their were from Alanon and AA and nobody was acting like that larger than life personality trying to get attention.  I don't honestly think a person could get away with that for very long when visiting with this recovering family before being called on it in a fun loving way.  The dad is one of those humble and welcoming people who just loves getting to know everyone and learning all about you.  The mom was disappointed that just as she got everything settled concerning food and could socialize, people were leaving.  The son celebrating sobriety had a sweet girl with him who he'd met since getting sober.

I felt grateful for a day spent with sober alcoholics and a bit humbled.  There were a lot of years of sobriety filling that house at that celebration. I don't know if I'd ever have what it takes to accomplish that.  Some days I can't even keep a good attitude. 

Anyway, I know you read the statistics on people getting sober and keeping sober are not good but I think there's strength in small numbers too. I saw loving support from recovering family and from the fellowship at this first year of sobriety.  Though there aren't any guarantees, to me as an Alanon witnessing it, it was really icing on the celebration cake. :)    TT