The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I started out here in the chat room. Been around about 14 years. MIP has been nothing but a HUGE success becuz of John and many, many people.
What in the world would make us want to change a wonderful, safe, loving place?
If we change we cannot recommend Getting Them Sober, or anything else that THEY do not approve of. To me I am sick of control. We won't even be able to say you can find books at Amazon.We will have to stick to the strict rules that would make us unable to bring up certain things.
I have had enough of big brother is watching. I don't want anyone telling me I cannot tell someone about how to get help for abuse, homelessness, etc.
We all make this our home, what makes us need any fences around us saying, "don't go there?"
This is a family, I feel at home here, I love welcoming people here.
So please read that thread on top and see what a mess it would be to change. For me, this works, please leave our home to us.
I don't want to lose it!
debilyn
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Putting HP first, always <(*@*)>
"It's not so much being loved for ourselves, but more for being loved in spite of ourselves."
Good thread Debilyn. This is a great group and fairly large. it works well and sticks fairly close to Alanon principals.
I don't really attend the chat meetings. But i feel that they are really just different meetings of the same group. To have to run them as separate entities, I feel would be wrong...
I agree with Debilyn and why chance ruining such a beautiful site I have attended for years! I have left other sites because it gets so stringent and controlled, we love each other here and share great ESH, we have great moderators and all is well as I see it!
__________________
Sending you love and support on your journey always! BreakingFree
Al-Anon/Alateen Family Group Headquarters, Inc. 800-344-2666
" Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional."
"Serenity is when your body and mind are in the same place."
-- Edited by likemyheart on Sunday 27th of July 2014 12:25:33 PM
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I am strong in the broken places. ~ Unknown
All changes, even the most longed for, have their melancholy; for what we leave behind us is a part of ourselves; we must die to one life before we can enter another! ~ Anatole France
I read the wealth of info John and others have taken the time to provide, I think this site is a wonderful resource as is, and if it ain't broke don't fix it. I just emailed my vote in hopes that if nothing changes, nothing changes ;)
While I agree with the premise of what has been shared, I feel it is important to remember, that this board says "Al-Anon" all over it and while we don't want to be under any tight reins, as a group, we are not representing any other cause or organization here. We represent the name "Al-Anon", and therefore we present Al-Anon here. If this is not our primary purpose and focus, this board could be called "Whatever Anonymous". It isn"t and should never, ever qualify for such a open, roomy, broad scope. We are Al-Anon, and yes we should speak Al-Anon here. If we want to throw in a twist, that is not Al-Anon, we need to let it be known..."I would recommend this book...blah, blah, while it is not Al-Anon endorsed or approved by the world conference, was a good read and it helped me a lot." This way we are presenting something to someone but we clarify that its a personal suggestion. Not something being held out to them by Al-Anon, or by the Al-Anon program.
Please keep in mind that this may be the first threshold someone steps over in the new way of life Al-Anon offers and they need to be hearing Al-Anon. I have read over a 1000 books, that I would suggest to a variety of people, but when it comes to the newcomers, I point them to Al-Anon literature. "Oh, so the rage and anger, all that bundled up fear ruined a good friendship? Read page 54 and 55 of Al-Anon's Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions book, I have a few other suggestions that you might find helpful to read, but lets start there, and see if you can't find what you are looking for in those pages first, okay?" In short, let's get them plugged into Al-Anon before we start sending them in another direction and create confusion.
John
-- Edited by John on Sunday 27th of July 2014 05:47:45 PM
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" And what did we gain? A new life, with purpose, meaning and constant progress, and all the contentment and fulfillment that comes from such growth."
I too have to Agree with the Latter amounts here... I Goto Regular Al-Anon Meetings weekly, and I Still Manage to get just as Much if Not MORE Al-Anon from MIP... I Feel if this change is Made then there will be Alot of Peeps that will feel forced to choose another spot, and I know for Me, it will be tough not being able to just BE... without all the rules... I respect the idea but am in Complete agreement with "It if Isn't broke don't fix it" This has been a Home to Me for Over 5 years now, and I LOVE that we can be who we are, without feeling like we are breaking the rules of conduct... I Have always been one to Fear Change, but Forced Change really leaves a bad taste in my Mouth when it is something that has been such a Blessing for So Long... I Truly Hope things here "Remain the Same"....
Please keep it the same as it is....if my vote counts...This a comfortable site for me. I don't post often, but I do come on many times a week to just read and keep in touch.
I completed the form that John created for us to sign and e-mail back to the address that he has given us. It is my understanding that our vote will be counted at the business meeting if we are not in attendance. To answer Temple's question, I didn't give my response at this thread because I responded at John's and sent my vote in. I figure I talk too much as it is. Smile.
Oh, Kenny! I would really love, love, love to do that and John has put a sticky note at the top of the board with the wording, etc and the steps to take to get our vote in before the business meeting. I certainly don't want to duplicate another member's work and this "no" has absolutely nothing to do with I don't remember how to do it.
I voted and hope everyone gets their vote in! I started out here at MIP and in al-anon reading books like Getting Them Sober and Codependent No More which are not CAL approved, I however still attend al-anon face to face meetings and have a sponsor and work a solid program and have come a long way! So with that said I don't understand how we can be sending people astray by giving them the ESH that worked for us and this is why Canadianguy left I can only assume, because people were having fits about Tony Rice Drews books or Melody Beattie being suggested, it's about taking what you like and what works for you and leaving the rest! The majority will rule and I sure hope that it doesn't take place!
-- Edited by Breakingfree on Wednesday 30th of July 2014 10:54:09 PM
__________________
Sending you love and support on your journey always! BreakingFree
Al-Anon/Alateen Family Group Headquarters, Inc. 800-344-2666
" Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional."
"Serenity is when your body and mind are in the same place."
Mercedes thanks for the update.
I was unable to attend the meeting but did submit my vote via email. I am pleased that the membership voted" no" on the issue.
I think that was a good decision for the members here, it sounds like it would have been impossible to tick all the alanon boxes. I also think its important not to get into a them and us mindset. We all give esh that is based closely on the principles, its because of alanon that were here. Personally, I love alanon, its given me a new way to think, a better life. I feel so much better, if we could be a full alanon group with the same alanon rules, without all the red tape and hassle then I would vote yes, definately. It works, most of us know it works, why wouldnt we embrace it IF membership did not come with a change to the format of the forum?
Ps, cant believe a good guy like canadian guy would leave due to people having different opinions than him about books, sounds ridiculous to me.