The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I broke down a wall today that I had been hiding behind for such a long time. I finally told my mom just how bad my husbands drinking has gotten. For so many years I did not want to admit this to anyone. Somehow I have felt that I carried part of the blame for this. I know now (through Al-Anon) that I'm not to blame, but it's still hard to change old mind sets. My mom knew he drank, but she didn't know how much. My two sons have known he is an alcoholic for a couple of years.
She told me his drinking was not my fault and that I needed to get out and do more fun things for myself. (Wow, you'd think she had been to Al-Anon meetings herself.) It felt good to tell her. It was like part of my burden had been lifted. I also told her that I had been going to Al-Anon meetings. She had no idea what that was, so I had to explain. I have to drive about 25 miles(one way) to my meetings, and this caused her some concern. When she realized how much the meetings were helping me, she felt better about the drive. (my meetings are at night and I have cataracts.)
I have always felt I needed to protect my family from the truth. I didn't want them to be hurt, but I am slowly understanding that I am hurting them, myself and my husband by not telling them the truth. I am not ready to tell any other family members, but I feel good that I was able to tell my mom.
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Look for the rainbow after the storm, and I'm sending you a double dose of HOPE. H-hold O-on P-pain E-ends
I'm glad you did that for yourself and for your Mom, too. Good work being open and honest with yourself and with her and to receive the affirmation and support you needed from her. (((CS)))
Good job. It's important to have help from family members if possible. My mom had an A father, so she totally understands. She started to share some really sad stories from her childhood. I know I don't want my kids living with an A. That's why I moved out. Be careful driving to the meetings. It's also good to find a sponsor if you don't have one.
