The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
called my AH tonight trying to help him understand the seriousness of us possibly losing our house soon. He says he is too busy and needs to go to hardware store. He always runs to the store right before it closes...racing there like a maniac. my AH said he would have a job by the end of June. No job. He supposedly doesn't drink....but he is still so dysfunctional. Runs around like a chicken with his head cut off! Jumps from one project to another. The other day I was journaling and I made a list of all the vehicles/boats he has surrounding our house...and the final count is NINE!!! Whoopee!!!
He doesn't agree with an offer we received on our fixer upper home and thinks we can get more. So I told him get an appraisal. I know he won't do it. So I am calling a real estate attorney for a free consultation. I know I have to be the one to do it all...file divorce papers, sell the house...etc etc. today I got more stuff out of the house so it felt good. I donated some books and also sold some for $10. Bought a "Best of Journey Hits" and blasted it on the radio. Music sure helps my mood.
One step at a time. He is in denial. But I am not. I have to see things clearly and get the job done. i am also trying to journal on every bizarre thing he says and does. It's exhausting.
My x and I used to behave like children although we thought we were grown ups in our early 20s. "You do it. No, you do it. I'll do it. No, I'll do it." was a common theme in our conversations though we used different words. Glad you are seeing that he isn't going to do it and you are taking steps to take care of yourself and protect your financial interests in the best way you know how. It's stressful for you but I'll bet its not as stressful as waiting for him to do what he obviously doesn't have the mental or emotional stamina to do right now. Choosing not to argue with him or engage with his disease - good program practice and progress.
