The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I wonder if others with A partners feel this way: filled with relief that the weekend of togetherness and all that that entails is finally over and everyone's back to work and school on Monday. It's sad not to look forward to the weekend the way most people do, but I haven't for years and years. I can't always say that I look forward to work, but knowing that I only have a couple of hours with my AH each night is a good feeling. He may not speak to me, but at least it's not all day and night!
Today, I'm trying to keep the serenity going as I anticipate dealing with that silent treatment tonight.
Can you change up your tonight and go to a meeting, movie or a friend's home instead? To me, the silent treatment works if somebody is there to experience it. Not unlike the question: If a tree falls in the forest does it make a sound if no one is there? 30 evenings in a row of not being home for the silent treatment may result in a change of behavior on the part of Sir Punish with Silence. There's no payoff for him if no one is there. It can also help to lift your spirits and find enjoyment for yourself, too.
-- Edited by grateful2be on Monday 14th of July 2014 02:15:06 PM
I thought I was the only one that felt like that. Weekends, I loathe. I love when Monday roles around. At least in summer I can get out of house and run around Sat-Sun. Winters are the worst when I am stuck in the house w/ this person that just hates me.
Yep. I would get busy living. Make alanon and the fellowship your main focus. It will truly save you. Half alanon won't work...same as half-hearted AA won't work for the A. I would not hang around that negativity. 30 alanon meetings in 30 days sounds like a great suggestion. I did like 120 meetings in 90 days when I first went to AA. And I did it while working full time. I didn't want to be home either and the fellowship saved me.
Another thing you could try is get out the UNO or Yhatzee games and ask for a game or two and if he isn't into that then the meeting will also work. Sometimes the lost connection had to do with my unwillingness also. Recovery is about changing my part in it which of course isn't the whole part. Just saying. ((((hugs))))
